There is no Dick Clark but the final count down is on.

Discussion in 'Substance Abuse' started by Littleboylost, Feb 23, 2018.

  1. Littleboylost

    Littleboylost On the road unwanted to travel

    March 5 can not come soon enough! We have struggled with son through dental visits and medical exams all of which were required to be done before entry into his long term rehab program. Honestly getting into private school would have been easier.

    He has acted out and tries to wriggkebiutbof going March 5th. Not happening. He is out of options.

    Codependent girlfriend still remains an issue.

    work is hectic for me and husband is away a lot with work.

    I wish I had more time to be here with you all.

    I will keep you updated on how the admission goes.
     
    • Friendly Friendly x 6
    • Like Like x 1
    • List
  2. startingfresh

    startingfresh Member

    I've been thinking of you, hoping that no news was good. Oh yes, amazing how difficult a simple doctor appointment can be with teens like ours. Just over a week to go.....you are almost there.
     
    • Friendly Friendly x 3
    • Winner Winner x 1
    • List
  3. BloodiedButUnbowed

    BloodiedButUnbowed Active Member

    Thinking of you and keeping fingers crossed.

    Maybe you and H should decide in advance on the consequences in the event E refuses to leave for rehab.

    Sounds like that might be a real possibility.

    Take care of yourself and continue to keep us all posted. We are all with you in spirit!
     
  4. Littleboylost

    Littleboylost On the road unwanted to travel

    ThTs simple it will be prison.
     
  5. susiestar

    susiestar Roll With It

    Do what you need to do for yourself. Know that we are thinking of you and will be here whenever you have time. Don't worry about the need to make time to post. We shouldn't be another pressure for you. We mean to be the pressure relief valve as much as we can be, not another source of pressure!

    I am glad the date is coming soon. I expect him to try to wriggle out. At this point, he only has 2 clear choices. It is my understanding that you have no options in this situation either. The money he stole was not from you, so you cannot "drop" any charges. The court has given him the choice, he is a legal adult, and if he thinks he can run away from the charges, well, he is an adult and some try that. Few are successful.

    Do what you need to in the next few weeks to stay sane!!
     
    • Friendly Friendly x 2
    • Agree Agree x 1
    • Winner Winner x 1
    • List
  6. Albatross

    Albatross Well-Known Member

    Tick-tock...glad the day is almost here. You've been a true warrior in waiting this out.

    I know the choice he has legally is either go to rehab or go to prison, but does he have to COMPLETE the program to avoid prison? Not to be negative, but I agree with the others. Keep your armor on to deflect his efforts to dissuade you from sending him or making him stay.
     
    • Agree Agree x 2
    • Winner Winner x 2
    • Friendly Friendly x 1
    • List
  7. Littleboylost

    Littleboylost On the road unwanted to travel

    Hi Albi;

    He must complete the full recommended program and it will be a min of 6 months. If not he will fave his full set of charges.
     
    • Agree Agree x 2
    • Friendly Friendly x 2
    • List
  8. New Leaf

    New Leaf Well-Known Member

    LBL my thoughts and prayers are with you. You have been so patient in waiting for this day to come. It will be up to your son to really make it work. Preaching to the choir, I know.
    Please take care of yourself and keep strengthening yourself for whatever comes along.
    My two somehow have managed all of these years to stay under the radar of authorities and continue as is.
    For your son in this position, he has a choice to get clean or go to jail. I am thinking either way it is a lesson for him, you know?
    Hopefully whatever happens will prove to be a pivot point for him.
    No matter what, it is also a chance for you to keep working on the rest of your life.
    You matter, you have worth and much to look forward to, for you and your husband.
    Many warm hugs to you.
    Leafy
     
    • Friendly Friendly x 4
    • Agree Agree x 1
    • List
  9. Littleboylost

    Littleboylost On the road unwanted to travel

    I need this today it is a bad day found cocaine and weed on him he had a total meltdown grabbed the cocaine and did a runner from the car after a screaming fit. How humiliating right in the grocery store parking lot.
    I have a bed waiting foe him in detox and it is detox or jail. I am not living in chaos for not one more day let alone seven more. He can go to rehab from detox.
     
    • Agree Agree x 2
    • Friendly Friendly x 1
    • List
  10. BloodiedButUnbowed

    BloodiedButUnbowed Active Member

    Good for you LBL! I posted a reply saying exactly what you did but didn't realize it until I re-read it.

    Is detox part of the correctional or hospital system in Canada? Here it is usually part of rehab.

    You are making the right choice. He is killing himself. You should not be part of that.

    Keep us posted, we are here for you and rooting for you!
     
  11. ColleenB

    ColleenB Active Member

    I don’t blame you. He needs detox . And you need a break.
     
  12. Copabanana

    Copabanana Well-Known Member

    I agree. Start rolling this up. If you let him he will escalate and escalate and you will be the one in inpatient.

    Detox now or call the prosecutor, courts or cops, probation, whichever, to pick him up.

    Nobody could tolerate this. I am sorry lbl.
     
    • Agree Agree x 2
    • Friendly Friendly x 1
    • List
  13. Littleboylost

    Littleboylost On the road unwanted to travel

    Acting out getting violent refused to go I called the police. He told me he :censored2:ing hates me and then asked his dad to drive him to Detox. Said he never wants to see me again.
    Mid their that mad we are doing something right, right? It doesn’t feel so great.
     
    • Friendly Friendly x 7
    • Agree Agree x 1
    • List
  14. Albatross

    Albatross Well-Known Member

    Good, good, good LBL. This is EXACTLY the right thing to do, and though it does not feel like it now he will thank you later. Keep the faith. He is in a spot where he can get better now.
     
    • Agree Agree x 2
    • Winner Winner x 1
    • Friendly Friendly x 1
    • List
  15. New Leaf

    New Leaf Well-Known Member

    LBL, I am sorry for this. He is not in his right mind. Hard as it is, try not to take it personally. This is an addict on drugs talking.
    You are doing the right thing.
    I am sending up prayers and circling the wagons for you, hoping your son will detox and then go to rehab and get his head on straight.
    You and your husband do not deserve to live in your sons chaos. Enough, is enough. Please take time for you, to breathe and recuperate. I know how very difficult this is. Many warm hugs, and understanding tears.
    Drugs really, really suck.
    (((HUGS)))
    Leafy
     
    • Agree Agree x 2
    • Friendly Friendly x 2
    • Winner Winner x 1
    • List
  16. ColleenB

    ColleenB Active Member

    Of course he says those things right now. He is an addict and you are saying enough.

    It isn’t how your son feels about you it’s how the addict feels as he is desperate at this point.

    Please take a deep breath and know you did the right and necessary next step. The addict gave you no choice.

    I pray for some peace for you .... hugs xoxo
     
    • Agree Agree x 4
    • Winner Winner x 2
    • Friendly Friendly x 2
    • List
  17. BloodiedButUnbowed

    BloodiedButUnbowed Active Member

    His words belong to the demon of addiction hanging on for dear life to continue inhabiting your son’s body and spirit. You are driving the demon out and it is fighting back. Stay strong, stay the course. When the drugs are out of his system the real E will return.

    You did the right thing girlfriend, so proud of you.

    Prayers for your family and for E.
     
    • Agree Agree x 4
    • Friendly Friendly x 2
    • List
  18. Littleboylost

    Littleboylost On the road unwanted to travel

    Power in numbers my friends. Thank you. I am not feeling the best and these words help so very much.
    Sometimes actions of love cause more pain than the human heart can barely hold. I don’t know if I will survive this.
    I don’t know how all of you have survived with such grace and wisdom.
     
    • Friendly Friendly x 2
    • Informative Informative x 1
    • List
  19. Copabanana

    Copabanana Well-Known Member

    Lbl. Where are things right now? Did he get to detox?

    You had no other choice. Everything was at stake. That was why he went nuts. He knew it too. He knew you would draw the line and make him go. He needed that from you. You came through for him and this is exactly the outcome he was seeking. Really.

    He is not mad. Really. Everything will be OK. Truly. I am not saying there will not be setbacks. There will. You know that.

    You did good. Everything in these last months was building to this crisis point. In the moment of truth you held the line.

    Good for you. Rest now.
     
    • Winner Winner x 3
    • Agree Agree x 1
    • List
  20. strangeworld

    strangeworld Member

    All I can say is good luck and know you have done all you can. So, so intensely painful for the heart. I really admire your strength in sticking with your boundaries. I wish I could get to that point. Just can't right now.