I'm learning about detaching and tough love today. Who thought it would be so much fun?!?! I finally brainstormed a way to get my message out to difficult child about acting his age and treating people with respect. difficult child is a teen boy and eats accordingly. I am an excellent cook, I bake a good portion of our breads and don't use a machine just to give you the idea. difficult child is very food motivated. I am also quite tired of being treated like a servant and a nuisance in my own home. Today I got 'payback' and difficult child has be responsible for himself. This is what was left out for him to wake up to this morning. husband and I had pancakes. I needed pictorial evidence just in case he tries to say I don't feed him. The meals are nutritionally complete. He loves to be the victim. I have taught him to cook, he IS high functioning. I also left out recipes just in case. There are two packets of instant oatmeal in one bowl. A cup of beans in another A cup of rice in another still. (those will cook up to be a lot more and will feed him all day) One bowl has onion, celery, bell pepper and radishes. There is one apple and two tangerines. The baby food jars have pre measure instant milk powder (guess stealing food and the locks we installed finally came into play) In the measuring cup what you don't see are some seasonings for the beans. (I'm not cruel after all) I'm in my room avoiding more of his tirade. He is in the kitchen getting his beans ready, so far so good. The way I see it there are many lessons in all of this, lessons I will impart upon him after he cries uncle. If he doesn't cry uncle that's fine too. That will just mean he is more responsible for himself. *Treat Mom like garbage no treats from her kitchen *Argue about dishes no need to clean kitchen after Mom, Mom isn't cooking for you. Clean up your own mess or cook in dirty pots. *Beans and rice get boring after a week or so, especially when Mom and Dad can afford to go out to eat or can afford yummy stuff. Might be a good time to consider effort in school and grades. Bad grades, no diploma = bad job and no money for nice food. Ie: get used to beans and rice. *Cooking is a life skill that may come in handy for a difficult child who chooses to act like a mean person because that choice will lead to an invitation to leave at age 18. That should about cover it. Plus, I get a day off. by the way, my point chart is still in place but it will be hard for him to earn points for filling the dishwasher if I'm not making big meals.