I need some input here..... don't know if you all saw my update on the other thread. My son texted me yesterday and asked for help figuring out what to do about the apartment situation. His original plan, when he came back here against our advice was to get an apt with the girlfriend. Now they have broken up. So clearly his plan when he came back here has fallen through as I kind of knew it would. Gosh I hate being right sometimes. We know he has slipped into some substance use, don't know how much. We also know he is battling depression and very much wants to see a doctor and get back on an antidepressant (that is good). He has a job and is working and keeping that job. It is a minimum wage job so he doesn't make a lot but he is working. If he wasn't working I might take a hard stand like he should go back to where he was or go to a program somewhere etc, but the fact he has a job is huge. The house he is staying at is awful.... the father drinks and smokes pot with the kids who stay there, the mother I think is an addict, there are other kids all living there... it is a mess. It is not a good environment for him and will not help him with his sobriety. There is no way he can come home and live here, as we need to think of our daughter who does not need the stress of him being home, and fact is neither do we. We would be willing to help pay for him to live in a sober living place, and a part of me wants to take the stand that is the only thing we will do....except that I am not sure there is one that is close enough to his job that he can get there reasonably.... or a good one for that matter. I also don't know if he is really ready to commit to that? And if he goes it has to be when he is ready to do the work. Apartments around here are so expensive that there is no way he can afford one on his own...even a studio. He just doesn't make enough money. Even a room in a house is probably more than he can afford, and finding one is going to be hard. He has asked for our help figuring this out which is also huge.... given he is a kid who has been pretty rejectinig of us in the past. So we are meeting him for dinner tonight... all I have said so far is that we would help pay for a sober living place. But I am wondering should we be wiling to help him pay rent somewhere. I don't want to pay the whole rent, I think he needs to pay 1/3 of his income to rent and be responsible but I don't think he will find a place for that amount. Although we are concerned that he may very well turn to full blown addiction and substance abuse, we don't want to encourage him in that direciton and to fail. He is currently doing some good things (and some not) and we have the feeling if he stays where he is, he is more likely to fail than if he gets out of there. Ideas?