Where does this fit?

[Ltlredhen]

OK, not real sure where to post this question so if this is the wrong board, please move it to the right one.

As you all know my difficult child is in week 4 of prek. First 2 weeks were great, 3rd one he was really getting used to them and they began to see little signs of the behavior I've been describing to them. Monday was holiday, Tues and Wed he was out sick. This morning I had a discussion about bathroom hygiene with the full time classroom aide. I told her that difficult child told me he goes and hides when he has to go to the bathroom cause he can't wipe himself. She said we let them go to the bathroom whenever they want. I told her that was not the issue, difficult child has great difficulty wiping himself and if no one helps him he will hide and just not go at all. She said they were not allowed to wipe but that she could stand at the door and hand him some wet wipes.

OK, is this the regular way this is handled at school? I don't know who to discuss this with at the school. Where do I start. His evaluation is not completed, not had the psy or Occupational Therapist (OT) part. Do I tell the diagnostician, wait and tell one of these evaluators? Any input from you guys?


Also, walking down sidewalk this morning a little boy (maybe 2nd gradish) just came up and started talking to us. Never saw this kid before in my life. I just smiled and answered him back like normal but difficult child immediately was defensive, pulled back on my arm and said quite loudly "you are a stranger" "go away" and was quite upset. I believe this is part of the Pervasive Developmental Disorder (PDD) stuff, am I correct? Is this what social skills would work on?


Donna

 

[SRL]

Remind us, is this a regular private or public school classroom and if so, is there a "must be potty trained" requirement?

I have been surprised by what teachers could accomplish with my child when I was sure he "couldn't". I would talk to the actual teacher first and find out what they do with children who need training in personal hygeine.

 

[Ltlredhen]

This is a public mainstream prek classroom.

He was in a PPCD (SE) class for 3 months in the spring and they took care of everything that needed to be done.

He tries to wipe by sometimes just totally avoids the entire thing. Like ignoring will make it go away I guess. I sometimes have to play little games to get him to the bathroom at home like see who can run the fastest and get there first, etc... I know teachers are not expected to do this, lol. But on the other hand, he can't be expected to just ignore bodily functions and needs help figuring out what to do about this.

Donna

 

[SRL]

Most non-Special Education preschools for this age do have some kind of "potty trained" requirements in their guidelines and the expectation would be for the child to be able to handle this routinely. Of course, emergencies do occur when a teacher would step in to help but it wouldn't be the norm. If his former class was "taking care of everything" and sent him into a classroom where he'd need to be self-sufficient in this area it sounds like another area in which they totally missed the boat. Helping them to become self sufficient in these sorts of daily life skills is usually built right into the curriculum or IEP.

Just FYI, it's not uncommon for Pervasive Developmental Disorder (PDD) kids (boys in particular) to not be fully trained and self sufficient until around age 5. Often there's a lot contributing to that including sensory issues surrounding either going and/or tidying up after.

I'd start by talking to the actual teacher. Given the situation where he was recommended to be mainstreamed and that you mid-evaluation sometimes districts will bring in someone to help put a plan in place to tide you over until the IEP stage. (ie an Occupational Therapist (OT) comes in as consult) but on the other hand I've seen kindergarten teachers have to gut out a lot of stuff until the whole process was complete.

 

[Martie]

Ok--here's the information you need"

First, don't get "policy" information from an aide--or sometimes even a teacher--but a teracher is a lot better start than an aide.

Second, there is no such thing a "potty training requirements" in Sepcial Ed. Generaltions of children were denied school access because of this. Not only do school have to "wipe," they have to change diapers, do intermittant clean catheterization IN ORDER FOR children to receive an education. This has been to the Supreme Court and back twice and the parents won in both cases.

Now, what should you do since you are mid-evaluation? I agree with SRL that the first thing to do is talk to the teacher and point out that your child is coming from a Spec. Ed environment, and he is in a regular class for a good reason, but there are going to be some transitional issues, and hygiene independence appears to be one of them. Kindergarten teachers are not unfamiliar with these sorts of problems; they may EXPECT whatever they want but there are always children who cannot manage their clothing, button, or wipe their noses as well as other parts of their bodies. These are non-Special Education children I am talking about.

Your child CANNOT be staffed to a more restrictive placement just because he needs to learn some things about hygiene. I am assuming he will qualify for Sp Ed, and when he does, then it is a matter of figuring who is responsible for teaching him this skill. Then he will learn how to do it, and it won't be a problem anymore. That is what schools are supposed to do: teach kids what they need to learn, not set up barriers to the child attending school in the first place.

Excluing children abitrarily or placing them in overly restricive settings due to limitations in either bodily function or lack of current learning is a very sensitive issue and your SD should be well aware of this. Do NOT accept anything other than treating this as something your child needs to learn.

by the way, PRIVATE preschools can say that children may not attend a program if they are not toilet trained--or they can say, kids can wear diapers or pull ups, but we won't change them. It is different with a private preschool--they have a legal right to set standards like this, since no child is entitled to attend a particular private preschool. However, because public schools are for ALL children, they most definitely cannot do this and be within the law.

Martie