You know you have a difficult child when . . .

Discussion in 'Substance Abuse' started by pigless in VA, Mar 10, 2017.

  1. pigless in VA

    pigless in VA Well-Known Member

    He tells you that he has to go to court for possession of marijuana, and you are happy about it.

    I've talked to him about smoking. He doesn't think it's a big deal. He and his buddy were nabbed by the cops and both of them have to go to court on Monday. I refuse to take off work with no pay to go to this. Have I ever mentioned that Ferb has never gotten a driver's license? It's a long walk to the courthouse.
     
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  2. ksm

    ksm Well-Known Member

    You know you have a difficult child when... If you have one suggestion to help them, they have five reasons it won't work...
     
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  3. RN0441

    RN0441 100% better than I was but not at 100% yet

    When your husband's car trunk is where you stash your booze! (Oh and hide the keys)

    OR

    When you have to hide stuff (your purse/wallet/keys) and you keep moving stuff because he finds it and you forget where you've hidden it!
     
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  4. so ready to live

    so ready to live Active Member

    When you hide your purse in dirty laundry hamper and husband decides to do a load...really? you didn't feel a big blob of leather in there? $ does wash well...
     
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  5. SomewhereOutThere

    SomewhereOutThere Well-Known Member

    You know you have a difficult child when he refuses to taken proven psychiatric medications but smokes pot because it cures all and is actually healthy and besides its your fault he needs it. And you actually wonder if you drove him to pot, joblessness, and abuse of yourself by him/her no longer shocks you or causes you outrage. In fact, you take accusations of things that never happened to heart and soul. Sad really.
     
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  6. Nancy

    Nancy Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Hi pigless,, nice to see you ;)
     
  7. Lil

    Lil Well-Known Member

    ...when he'd rather be homeless in Colorado where weed is legal than gainfully employed and in his own place in Missouri where it's not.
     
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  8. pigless in VA

    pigless in VA Well-Known Member

    I wonder how long it would take Ferb to walk to Colorado.
     
  9. Catmom

    Catmom Member

    When you realize that it is more effective talking to the cat instead of your son. The cat at least looks like he is listening to you, that is, before he walks away and ignores what you say also.
     
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  10. ksm

    ksm Well-Known Member

    When they take multiple days off from work, then gets sick and doesn't call in, gets fired, and then self righteously complains, "but they fired me for getting sick for only ONE day!"

    Ksm
     
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  11. Mamacat

    Mamacat Active Member

    When you've been friended\unfriended multiple times on fb
     
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  12. ksm

    ksm Well-Known Member

    I should have known I had a Difficult Child when she was 10 and, after telling her that she and her sister HAD to work out a compromise. Four hours later she came to me and said "I have tried and tried to compromise, but she still wont do it my way!!!"
     
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  13. Frieda

    Frieda New Member

    ..when you have to talk yourself through your anxiety every time in order to answer a call from school or open an email from school. On the plus you never have to introduce yourself when you go to said school because magically every singe person seems to know you ( as ____'_ mom). At every school (6 so far) within 1 week. Magic.
     
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  14. Copabanana

    Copabanana Well-Known Member

    When you are on an anonymous forum day and night for 2 years and you feel this place is your real life.
     
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  15. dayatatime

    dayatatime Member

    When every refused request for money comes to involve, in the rebuttal, the phrase "just let me, your son starve" even after you're sure he stole money. Or when your own grip on events gets uncertain because you have no proof, but there's really no other explanation.

    Or when there's constant insistence that he is actively working on change, even when he calls from a drug friend's house.

    Or when you think you just can't feel shame anymore, already having faced circumstance after circumstance where you can't hide what's going on to others, and having been accepted instead of cast out, but then you feel more shame, more heartbreak.

    Or when you have so much practice staying calm that he can tell you about a violent crime he was somewhat involved in and you can take in without shock or outrage.
     
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  16. SomewhereOutThere

    SomewhereOutThere Well-Known Member

    You know you have a difficult child when you are very excited because they get a job delivering pizza, even though they have high potential.

    You get used to them quitting their jobs because their boss told them what to do.
     
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  17. wisernow

    wisernow wisernow

    when at the age of four he refuses to put his shoes on for school and tells an exasperated me "I am just testing your parenting skills"....little did we know what we were in for.........
     
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  18. KTMom91

    KTMom91 Well-Known Member

    When, at the age of 18, he throws a tantrum and tells his father, "Just forget it, forget everything, forget you even had a son," three days before his birthday, and then is outraged that no one acknowledged it. (Son #1)

    When he makes the announcement that he no longer wishes to be part of the family, and is then insulted that no one speaks to him for three days. (Son #2)

    When you get so many calls from school about her that you pick and choose which behaviors to deal with, and you often amuse yourself by poking at the school official calling you for something relatively minor. The "red hair that looked kind of purple in the sunlight" call comes to mind. (Miss KT)
     
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  19. in a daze

    in a daze Well-Known Member

    We had a thread like this going a few years ago. I found it, and here's what I wrote: (note...he's been sober for over a year, takes his medications responsibly and goes to work every day and doesn't live with us. He's much improved).



    If your parents wake up in the morning and find you drunk out of your mind on some booze that they hid in the closet that they thought you would never find....

    If it's 11 AM and you are still in bed even though you were supposed to be at the office at 9 AM and your mom is yelling at you to get up and this happens at least three times a week...

    If your mom has to dole out your medications every day because you can't be trusted to take them responsibly...

    If she has to hide your medication because they are controlled substances but you get them anyway no matter where they are hidden or or even if they are locked up...

    If your mom has to take her purse to bed with her and lock the bedroom door...

    YOU MIGHT BE A difficult child!!! (Insert Jeff Foxworthy voice)
     
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  20. RN0441

    RN0441 100% better than I was but not at 100% yet

    If you have learned to look back and laugh at the things that have happened that are so utterly outrageous because you've already cried an ocean of tears.....
     
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