A New Nominee for "Drama Queen"...

Discussion in 'The Watercooler' started by DaisyFace, Aug 15, 2011.

  1. DaisyFace

    DaisyFace Love me...Love me not

    If I ever, ever wondered whether difficult child's issues might have possibly been inherited....that has been answered most definitively once and for all by my scheming, conniving, manipulative MOTHER!

    As you may remember, we are planning a trip soon to visit "family" (I'll use that term loosely...) My mother made a very big deal about not being able to get time off work to see us. In fact, she let us know that even a few hours in a restaurant would probably be impossible to manage.

    OK - fine. We have not let Mother ruin our plans. We have made arrangements to meet up with other folks who would LOVE to see us and we have scheduled some fun events for our trip.

    Word gets back to Mother.

    Mother decides that she indeed WILL be able to see us - but only for a few brief hours. She is going to host a dinner and arrange it so that IF we want to see any of HER relatives - they will all need to meet at Mother's house during those couple of hours. Mother will plan it all. Then...she told us not to expect to see any of them because that will be SOOOOO difficult because we did not give them enough notice.

    No problem - we told her. We've already made plans to meet up with those folks....so thanks anyway!

    Mother is not happy. Mother calls my sister and tells Sister the wrong dates for our visit. Mother tells Sister that our visit will conflict with a planned trip. Mother tells Sister that she needs to cancel her plans to visit with us.

    Mother calls grandparents. Tells them we want to stay at their house for a week. This is not true - but it stresses Grandparents out.

    Mother calls me. Tells me Grandparents are dying. If we visit them, the strain - will KILL them.

    Mother says that if we visit dying Grandparents, we will be soley responsible for causing their DEATH.



    Geez - I can't help but feel that it's just too bad our visit is not causing some of that "deathly strain" for Mother!

  2. keista

    keista New Member


    These things often do skip generations.
  3. DammitJanet

    DammitJanet Well-Known Member Staff Member

    I wish it had skipped a generation in my family...lol.

    Gosh...what a piece of work. Seems she cant stand to be out of the limelight. Are you another one who is responsible for everything under the sun? I am wholly responsible for all the wrongs on planet earth!
  4. susiestar

    susiestar Roll With It

    I'm sorry. Your mother sounds like a true difficult child. Do you ever wonder how you turned out so awesome and nice and relatively "normal" with a mom like that? I have when my mom pulls her koi.

    Is it maybe time to consider just not letting her know when you make plans in the future? It sounds like visiting her area would be a lot of fun if you just had never told her about your visit. Of course that sets up much future drama but only if you answer the phone, read the email, open the door when she is going to lambast you.

    I hope you can let these people all know that anything your mother says about your visit that contradicts what YOU have told them is to be completely ignored as she is just trying to inflict conflama on all of you.

    (((((hugs))))) All of this conflama is about HER and not about you or your family.
  5. AnnieO

    AnnieO Shooting from the Hip


    How did you end up such a nice person?!
  6. cubsgirl

    cubsgirl Well-Known Member

    All I can say is WOW. I think your Mom might be related to my Mom.......only my Mom hasn't spoken to me in 17 years because she says I'm not mature enough to talk to her - she also doesn't talk to her sister, brother, mother, father, cousins, etc because they speak to me.

    ((hugs)) to you in dealing with this situation.
  7. KTMom91

    KTMom91 Well-Known Member

    Wow indeed...glad you went ahead and planned a fun vacation in spite of your mom.
  8. TeDo

    TeDo Guest

    Oh man, DF, that soooo sounds like my mother. Glad you are going anyway and taking care of details yourself. {{{{(((HUGS)))}}}}
  9. DaisyFace

    DaisyFace Love me...Love me not


    Well, up until very very recently - I had no idea that she WAS this manipulative.

    She is so good that she had me convinced that everything was ALL MY FAULT. I figured that I must be the one with the problem! I figured I must be a bit difficult child myself! LOL!

    So glad to finally learn after all these years that I can pass for "Normal".
  10. AnnieO

    AnnieO Shooting from the Hip

    DF, you're as normal as I am.

    Take that however you wish.
  11. Star*

    Star* call 911........call 911

    And the OSCAR goes to ......DF's Mother...........(APPLAUSE) WOW!
  12. HaoZi

    HaoZi Guest

    Wow. Hope difficult child the Younger doesn't get direct lessons from her.
  13. keista

    keista New Member

    Or jealous and up the ante.
  14. susiestar

    susiestar Roll With It

    Gee, I am sure she thinks she knows eeverything, including all you are doing wrong to make difficult child have her problems. I can't help but wonder what would happen if difficult child were to go live with your mom. Peace for you, all the drama/conflama in one household and all the drama queens together so that the other houses could have peace. Hmmmmm. Wonder if you could arrange it? Mom, you are SO MUCH better at handling kids than I am, could you take difficult child and straighten her out? I know it is "my fault" but I just can't figure out what I am doing that is hurting her. I really NEED your help with her.

    Yeah, it is a pack of bs, but DQ's LOVE that stuff and it might get a few weeks respite and wehn Mom sends difficult child back she is not going to want ANYTHING to do with you. And if she can 't "fox" difficult child then you can tell her to back off on whatever about your parenting because she couldn't do any better.

    Just an entertaining thought.
  15. TeDo

    TeDo Guest

    If she's anything like my mother, sending difficult child to live with her will only make things worse. My mom would send him back and say "you've done too much to make him this way that I can't FIX it". I would still be to blame and she would pull the told-you-so even more often than she already does. I am so sorry DF. Mothers like this hoover.
  16. AnnieO

    AnnieO Shooting from the Hip

    TeDo - mother in law is the same. She's mad at me right now, I told her if she made one more derogatory comment about husband or me or O or bio mom in front of J it would be the last time she saw him up close and personal.

    My Mom? Is willing to give us money to help the kids, but NO WAY does she think she can do better. She wonders how I deal.

    DF, this is awful but why don't you visit all those other people and then when she complains she didn't get to see you, tell her, "Oh, I'm SO sorry, Mom, we ran out of time..."