Hi,
I am a mum of two boys 6 & 7. The 7 year old is the reason I am on this forum. I think he has ODD - I say "think" as it has become more obvious to me in the last few months that his difficult and disruptive attitude maybe more serious than I realised.
He has never been an easy child - constant crying as a baby - he would only be happy when held and chatted to. He is very bright and communicated with in the first few days - making the same noise etc. - My mother says he looked as if he had lived before!
He went to playgroup and found it difficult - 3 months of crying, they made an exception to the rule as I went to class with him - only because the normal - "he will stop as soon as you leave" etc. did not apply and he would cry until he was collected again. He eventually settled and enjoyed the class but only with certain teachers. Once he moved into pre-primary he really did not get on with his teacher - a constant battle of wills - most of which he lost as he ended up in trouble.
We moved his school and he was happier - again it was the teacher that he liked and while there were still problems he and she dealt with them well although there was a fair amount of bullying (by him) even of very small children which resulted in several complaints from other parents.
He then started primary (at the same school). There were a few problems to start with mainly due to an uncertain start as he main teacher was ill and there was a sub for the first term. Once his correct teacher started things did improve. However the aggressiveness still continued and his attitude for compliance in the class room remained very low. We took him for therapy but looking back I do not think his problem was so obvious and perhaps we gave the incorrect information. Not much changed, however this Summer we took him to another therapist who has certainly dealt with his aggressiveness which has improved a huge amount - it is still there but he does manage to control it most of the time. However it is now more obvious that his problems are deeper than I thought - he seems anxious, believes he knows more than any one else, e.g he is an English child at a Spanish school and correct the English spelling in the books - incorrectly!, argues at every turn - every simple request - let the dog out, turn the TV down, have a shower etc is meet with defiance, his school work is very poor, his writing and reading below average, he constantly moves in class - either distracting others, himself or sharpening his pencil, going to the toilet etc. It is a battle to get homework done unless he feels like it, loves playing the piano but will not practice when asked, runs around making very odd noises, shouts instead of talks, jumps around when not occupied -e.g. when watching the Tv all great and quiet until an advert or the programme finishes and then all hell breaks loose - shouting, running, leaping on his brother or the dog, etc.etc. The positive side is that he is loving, loves cuddles, asks loads of intelligent questions, will keep occupied with something he likes e.g. lego, counting, has an amazing memory and when you are with him 1 - 1 and he has all or most of your attention then he is a model child and a joy to be with.
The advice I ask is - what should I do next? Drugs have been suggested to try to calm him down so that he can concentrate in class - any thoughts?
Thanks.
I am a mum of two boys 6 & 7. The 7 year old is the reason I am on this forum. I think he has ODD - I say "think" as it has become more obvious to me in the last few months that his difficult and disruptive attitude maybe more serious than I realised.
He has never been an easy child - constant crying as a baby - he would only be happy when held and chatted to. He is very bright and communicated with in the first few days - making the same noise etc. - My mother says he looked as if he had lived before!
He went to playgroup and found it difficult - 3 months of crying, they made an exception to the rule as I went to class with him - only because the normal - "he will stop as soon as you leave" etc. did not apply and he would cry until he was collected again. He eventually settled and enjoyed the class but only with certain teachers. Once he moved into pre-primary he really did not get on with his teacher - a constant battle of wills - most of which he lost as he ended up in trouble.
We moved his school and he was happier - again it was the teacher that he liked and while there were still problems he and she dealt with them well although there was a fair amount of bullying (by him) even of very small children which resulted in several complaints from other parents.
He then started primary (at the same school). There were a few problems to start with mainly due to an uncertain start as he main teacher was ill and there was a sub for the first term. Once his correct teacher started things did improve. However the aggressiveness still continued and his attitude for compliance in the class room remained very low. We took him for therapy but looking back I do not think his problem was so obvious and perhaps we gave the incorrect information. Not much changed, however this Summer we took him to another therapist who has certainly dealt with his aggressiveness which has improved a huge amount - it is still there but he does manage to control it most of the time. However it is now more obvious that his problems are deeper than I thought - he seems anxious, believes he knows more than any one else, e.g he is an English child at a Spanish school and correct the English spelling in the books - incorrectly!, argues at every turn - every simple request - let the dog out, turn the TV down, have a shower etc is meet with defiance, his school work is very poor, his writing and reading below average, he constantly moves in class - either distracting others, himself or sharpening his pencil, going to the toilet etc. It is a battle to get homework done unless he feels like it, loves playing the piano but will not practice when asked, runs around making very odd noises, shouts instead of talks, jumps around when not occupied -e.g. when watching the Tv all great and quiet until an advert or the programme finishes and then all hell breaks loose - shouting, running, leaping on his brother or the dog, etc.etc. The positive side is that he is loving, loves cuddles, asks loads of intelligent questions, will keep occupied with something he likes e.g. lego, counting, has an amazing memory and when you are with him 1 - 1 and he has all or most of your attention then he is a model child and a joy to be with.
The advice I ask is - what should I do next? Drugs have been suggested to try to calm him down so that he can concentrate in class - any thoughts?
Thanks.