Big step yesterday!

Discussion in 'Substance Abuse' started by PatriotsGirl, Mar 27, 2015.

  1. PatriotsGirl

    PatriotsGirl Well-Known Member

    We got our five minute phone call yesterday since visitation is this Saturday. She was ecstatic! She got to work in the thrift shop yesterday!! That is a major step and means she will be graduating to level two soon. She has completed steps 1 - 3 and they have been accepted. All she needs is for me to attend two more family counseling sessions and she should move up. :D

    We SO enjoy our Sundays together at church... <3 We both cry at every service but this past Sunday I looked at her and asked why she was crying and she said because she was SO happy. :) Then I received her letter on Monday that she had wrote before that saying how grateful she is to spend that time together on Sunday mornings and that she feels more like a family now than ever. This program has helped us ALL heal...

    Connor has been crying out for her lately...I think he is missing her. And vice versa - I told her that on the phone yesterday and she broke down a little. It will all be worth it in the end, though. This is my calling right now and I am good with that. :)

    Matter of fact, I hear the little man just woke up upstairs - time to get the day started! Have a great one everyone!
  2. InsaneCdn

    InsaneCdn Well-Known Member

    You have yourself a GREAT day and a great weekend, PG.
  3. Nancy

    Nancy Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Thanks for the update PG. Ah that all important step 4, I assume you mean in the twelve steps. That is the step my Difficult Child had the most difficulty with and just could not get past. It is a big accomplishment when they do and I'm rooting for your Difficult Child. She is making great progress.

    Have a great day.
  4. DoneDad

    DoneDad Active Member

  5. Nancy

    Nancy Well-Known Member Staff Member

    What does GiG mean Dad?
  6. PatriotsGirl

    PatriotsGirl Well-Known Member

    It means God is Good. :D

    And yes He is DoneDad!!!! <3
  7. Rina

    Rina Member

    This is awesome news!! I love reading good news like this.
    It really sounds like the program she's in is a good fit.
    Have a great weekend. :)
  8. SomewhereOutThere

    SomewhereOutThere Well-Known Member

    I don't know why you're so surprised, PG ;) I knew your daughter was better than her behavior. Relapsing is so common.

    She will eventually be a wonderful daughter and mother and you can talk about those bad ole days without the pain it causes you now.

    She is basically a good person who got in with a bad crowd. She will be ok :)
  9. Kathy813

    Kathy813 Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Awesome post, PG.
  10. stressedmama

    stressedmama Active Member

    I am so happy for you and your daughter, PG! My Difficult Child has been clean for just over 6 months but hasn't started step 4 yet. Sh's no longer in a supervised program. She attends NA and AA meetings and speaks with her sponsor daily but she said her sponsor didn't want her to move on to step 4 yet. Clearly she's not ready.

    I'm so gald your daughter is!! Enjoy your weekend!!
  11. PatriotsGirl

    PatriotsGirl Well-Known Member

    No - she has not completed step 4. She has completed steps 1 - 3. She got to work at the rehab's thrift store off site - that was the milestone. :) Her caseworker had told me earlier that it was the first step to getting a job and moving on to level 2 in the program - getting to work at their off site thrift store. They get paid for it, too. Once they feel she is ready to get a job and be working, they work with two places that hire them - one is a McDonald's and the other is a factory. But, for M, working at the off site thrift store was HUGE. :) She has also been made house mom. She said it just means that she assigns the chores but she was happy for the step up.

    So where is your Difficult Child living? Is she in a transition home? Is she seeing her son at all?
  12. recoveringenabler

    recoveringenabler Well-Known Member Staff Member

    I am so happy to read this PG. It just warms my guys all deserve this support so you can heal, be a family and be there for Connor........what a great post, thanks! Big hugs to you!
  13. PatriotsGirl

    PatriotsGirl Well-Known Member

    Thank you everyone!! <3
  14. stressedmama

    stressedmama Active Member

    She's renting a room in a house with others that are in recovery, but it's not a recovery house. Just roommates. Although she's been spending most, if not all, of her time with her boyfriend who still lives at home with his parents. He's also in recovery (about 7 yrs). Honestly, I'm not so sure she even still has a room at the other house or if she gave it up and is just living with boyfriend and his parents full time now. I asked the questions and got an answer but don't believe it...

    She doesn't call and ask about GS. We had dinner with her a couple weeks ago after her car accident and again last weekend when she returned the rental car. GS had a pretty meltdown the next evening and hubs and I believe it had to with the visit. Hubs actually said we needed to take a break from seeing Difficult Child for a while. I'll happily oblige. She does nothing for me...and what I mean by that is she doesn't affect my happiness and I really have let go of most of the anger/annoyance/hostility, etc. so she doesn't really affect me negatively, either.

    We go back to court in 3 weeks for permanent guardianship. She's not coming. I don't think she'll ever come back for him. And I'm ok with that, too.
  15. Nancy

    Nancy Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Stressed mama you sound very positive and bless you for taking the steps to provide a secure home for your GS. He is very lucky to have you.
  16. comatheart

    comatheart Active Member

    I just love reading positive updates on your daughter! I know ive said it before, but that program sounds so amazing. It's perfect for her!
  17. PatriotsGirl

    PatriotsGirl Well-Known Member

    I just love that program and everyone in it! I have really taken to a couple of the women in there that M is also close to. I got to see my daughter be her true self yesterday. She saw a girl crying and went over and hugged her. I saw her with the other children and saw how much they love her. She is SO good with them! :)

    My favorite moment was when she looked at me and told me that she has never felt this close to me. She said that she has always loved me, but gosh, she REALLY loves me. <3

    We are all beyond blessed that she is there. She said yesterday that she never wants to leave. They are renting another property out there so there is even more graduate housing. I think there are around 18 graduates still living on site. I don't blame them - why leave? It is a community where they share meals, church, and have that support right there. Yet they work, there is child care on site, and very little cost.

    There is a woman there in bad shape needing 24 hour surveillance. She sat with the staff at visitation yesterday - I thought she was mentally challenged but it is drugs - I don't know which one. M had her sit next to her on free night Friday night and gave her all her movie snacks. :)

    It gets heartbreaking taking Connor away each time we see her. He reaches and calls out for her and she holds it in until we leave and then loses it. :( but they say she is not there yet and I trust them. This is too important to rush anything...

    We will see her this Friday night at church. Our church is putting on a huge Easter production - it is going to be amazing!!! :)
  18. PatriotsGirl

    PatriotsGirl Well-Known Member

    Stressed - bless you for stepping up for this little boy!! If she isn't planning on being a mommy to him then she is probably better off staying away...why put him through that if she doesn't want to care for him?
  19. lovemyson1

    lovemyson1 Active Member

    PG, I'm so happy for your good news! I hope your daughter continues to get better & stronger! It truly is touching when our difficult children get sober and look at us and say they love us, feel close to us, appreciate us. I'm glad you're experiencing these moments. I feel bad for Connor but I'm sure you are the next best thing to his mama and giving him the love & support he needs until his mom is able to. I got to go to church with my son last Sunday as well, it was so amazing to see him healthy, at peace, singing, worshipping & even taking notes. He's very serious about his studies. Keep posting as things progress, I have positive thoughts & prayers going your way!
  20. PatriotsGirl

    PatriotsGirl Well-Known Member

    That is good to hear!! A relationship with God can change so, so much. It is truly changing my life, know you have converted when you can't wait to go to church every week!! :)