I have two 17 year old twins who have been spoiled by me from the beginning. They always got everything that they wanted, they were late in life kids and I have an absentee husband/dad who works 80 hour weeks. Many times I just gave in and continue with that pattern today. Boys did great in school up til the end of junior high. Once they got into high school their marks started to slip, in good part because they left any sports or other activities and got into smoking weed and cigarettes. One boy got into trouble with the law a couple of times in quick succession in late 2008, when he was in the middle of a medication wash for his ADD and bipolar diagnosis. (He had abused his Ativan and pysch NP pulled everything!) He then had a great spell of remission while on lithium and off the weed due to a mandated 90 day drug treatment. Once difficult childs 90 days was up, he went back to the weed and is now easily triggered into hypo-mania. NP wont change his scrips because it works just fine when you arent smoking dope. The other kid is not in any legal trouble but essentially does nothing, he goes to school on an irregular basis and both go late everyday. (I have to drive them, and they frequently make me late for work, as well.) They are both failing junior year, and have yet to look for work, either fulltime or summer. Why work when you are being supported by mom? A lady from my work lives up the road and recently retired. She talked about doing a walking program in the mornings and I would love to do this. However, that would require lumpy boys to a) get up on time b) catch their school bus at 6:50AM and c.) not have to be nagged by mommy from 5:45 til 8:00 when they finally get up. Would it be neglect to walk away from my children and do something for myself every morning? They are like overgrown 6 year olds, heck they got up better when they were six! On another matter, difficult child has a Probation officer because when he got in trouble I urged him to take preemptive action and go in to Probation and sign up for a PINS (person in need of supervision) voluntary Court diversion program. Of course the local Justice was impressed and gave my kid a conditional discharge that runs til December 09. (difficult childs accomplice who ignored a letter to attend at Probation got three years of full-blown Probation and 80 hours community service). Guess which kid is still testing clean and starting to act mature! Yes, the one whose parent didnt tell him what to do. Guess whose kid is about to end up with the same three years Probation mine. I feel like everything I do turns out wrong, and if I don't at least to get them to go to school, I will have given up on them.