concerned about difficult child

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by crazymama30, Nov 30, 2011.

  1. crazymama30

    crazymama30 Active Member

    I talked to difficult child on the phone tonight. He actually was more talkative than he has been before, so that was good.

    He cleared his throat non stop. I asked him if he was getting a cold, and he said no he was homesick. So maybe he was trying not to cry? Or is it a tic? He has always had a throat clearing tic, but it has never been that bad. I could not even understand him some of the time it was so bad.

    He has also lost 7lbs. When he went to first Residential Treatment Center (RTC), he weighed 106. He now weighs 99. He says he does not eat many of the meals as he does not like them. That is not a shocker, but what they don't realize is that if he does not like it? He will go hungry and not eat anything.

    I know I can only take what he says with a grain of salt, which is why I am glad I am going up there tomorrow for family therapy and hopefully his visit with psychiatrist also. He said they wanted to start him on depakote, and he said no. I really hope they would talk to me first. And it is hard, having him tell me stuff as I know that he gets things so mixed up.

    I just don't know what to think. I guess I will have to wait and see how things are tomorrow when I go up there.
  2. InsaneCdn

    InsaneCdn Well-Known Member

    Without getting stressed about it, its actually a good thing that he called.
    With you coming tomorrow, at least you have some sort of heads-up.
    Might not be totally accurate - but if he's anything like my difficult child, there will be enough truth to it that you won't be run over by a truck, Know what I mean??

    Like... the whole food thing. Whether he's REALLY lost that much or not, he obviously is sending home the message that the food isn't giving him what he needs... and he needs to eat. So... you CAN at least make it a topic of discussion while you are there. NOT that they would become short-order-cooks... can't do that in the setting he is in. But, there must be some creative ways to get some healthy calories into him.


    Hope the day goes well tomorrow!
  3. crazymama30

    crazymama30 Active Member

    yep, they are called peanut butter and jelly sandwiches.
  4. InsaneCdn

    InsaneCdn Well-Known Member

    Unless the Residential Treatment Center (RTC) is nut-free... (would be, here).
    How about packages of shelf-stable pepperoni sticks, and crackers... not directly to HIM, someone on the staff can dole them out when he's not eating much?

    Even in the hospital. - there is always an old standby if you don't want what's going... at our hospital, that was "hamburger"... as in, patty on a bun, salad optional. I think I had that for supper every single night. If you didn't like menu A, B or C... just wrote "hamburger" across the order, ticked off your drink, salad, desert choices...
  5. crazymama30

    crazymama30 Active Member

    I would not be worried about his weight, but he is small to begin with. He was finally at a normal weight. Guess that blows their "seroquel will cause him to gain weight" theory. They just do not understand my difficult child.
  6. Ma Kettle

    Ma Kettle New Member

    Just sending HUGS and best wishes that it gets worked out soon. :hugs:

    Ma Kettle
  7. KTMom91

    KTMom91 Well-Known Member

    Sending more hugs. Hope the therapy session goes well.
  8. pepperidge

    pepperidge New Member

    I suspect that the eating thing may be less about the food he doesn't like and more about the disruption to his life. Hopefully he will readjust. Also you took him off Abilify right, and he is still on the patch? So maybe that is having an impact on his appetite.

    the first time we saw my son when he was away he was just angryand not in a good mood. He was bummed out that he wasn't coming home but there was some manipulation in it as well. It sounds like your son is actually doing pretty well in the not manipulating you department.

    Hope you get the medication issues worked out. I know that concerns you a lot. How are discussions going with various psychiatrists on the medication wash?

    Safe driving. Hope your visit reassures you some. Hugs to you--this is tough.
  9. crazymama30

    crazymama30 Active Member

    Pepper, difficult child is still on 7.5mg of abilify daily And is up to 200 mg of seroquel daily. He is still on the vyvanse. I will post am update after our family therapy, which is I half am hour or so.
  10. buddy

    buddy New Member

    Hoping your session is going well..... looking for the update, {hug}
  11. cubsgirl

    cubsgirl Well-Known Member

    Sending good vibes that the session went well. Hopefully you can all figure out an eating plan that works for difficult child.
  12. Steely

    Steely Active Member

    Let us know how it goes.

    You are right, if he doesn't like the food, he just won't eat. That is a difficult child. Matt did the same thing in phosph. He was like 90 pounds, and he went down to 79 in 2 weeks. On my nightly visit I finally snuck him to the cafeteria where he gulped down about 10 pieces of chicken. He was starving. I got in BIG trouble for doing that - but my response was - he will die (literally) before he eats things he does not like - so you guys get to chose. I was so upset.

    As for the ticks, and clearing his throat thing, since his medications have not been changed too much - I would think it is stress? It is SO hard to tell over the phone. I am glad you get to see him in person - and please read them the riot act over the food. At the Residential Treatment Center (RTC) Matt went to, they gave the kids choices - if you didn't like the rice, you could eat broccoli instead - things like that. But the difference was that all their food was really healthy, and Matt was more prone to eat healthy food like I made him at home, than hospital type food.