history- last year my son (about time he turned 11) started showing signs of depression (thought it was situational- there was reason having to do with feeling rejection from father and a couple of other things), so i take him to family therapist but behavior gets real bad- stole 2 cell phones from school- and he was acting erratic, then dangerous) examples-- trying to jump from moving car a couple of times, rolling around on floor with kitchen knife (big one) saying he didn't care abbout anyone or anything anymore and if anyone tried to mess with him, he's hurt them, he gave his Christmas and birthday gifts away,he took a vial of chemicals from his kid's science kit to day care, he put leaves in the bottom of his tire swing then set it on fire then stood there swinging it back and forth toward himself while it was flaming. I FINALY was able to get him into a pediat acute hospital where he stayed 9 days, was diagnosed with- major depression (rule oout bipolar) and put on prozac. we start going to 2 counselors, psychiatrist, and have psychiatric/ed testing. Got him on an IEP, which didn't really go into effect until this past school year. He was stable and like old self from last April/May until this January and excited about going to middle school. we had quit going to the tdocs because neither of us were happy with-either of them. in hind-sight, i think it was because they were approaching it all like lecturing him on appropriate behavior and me on how i disciplined him when he was younger (one acted like it was too strict, one acted like i hadn't been strict enough) Personally, i thought we were there to get help on where to go from here and i don't think they were giving us any solutions or strategies. (Mind you, he's never had any "episodes" of 2-3 mos of erratic behavior or any diagnosis before so i didn't appreciate the "spoiled kid" theory) last year's psychiatrist test evaluation diagnosis him as depression with- disruptive conduct disorder not otherwise specified, rule out conduct and oppositional. difficult child had been doing well and psychiatrist was going to take him off prozac in feb., but i had seen a few small signs of depression return in late jan. and school had seen an escalation in disruptive conduct (minor in nature- escalation was in frequency), so medications were continued. then, about a week later, i find out he stole somethiing from a friend (no stealing between last spring and this incident, which didn't happen at school). i contact psychiatrist who increases dosage of medications. school was coming down on him-threatening to kick him out for being habitual offender. we had iep meeting and i asked for a sp ed specialist or psychiatric to be brought in to help implement a more effective IEP and BIP. i start checking into getting a new therapist and schedule appointment to see psychiatric. but a couple of days later, sd calls to comke get difficult child, he disrupted again and they can't take it anymore. this was a thurs. or fri. They scheduled IEP meeting for following Monday, then told difficult child he would be seeing hearing officer and wouldn't be coming back to that school. at IEP meeting on that Mon., they said he was acting impulsive so they thought this was not a manifestation. i disagreed and relayed my concern that impulsiveness in my difficult child can mean he's losing control again. I came home and difficult child was no where to be found. Later that eve., I get call that he was in juvy and arrested with- 7 charges stemming from a 2 hour crime spree the day before (Sun am). This involved going into what he thought was a vacant bldg turned out to be a residence (investigator said it did appear vacant), taking matches from there, going outside and starting leaves on fire (not near a bldg). Less than $100 damage, but 6 firetrucks called. Charges include felony arson, felony breaking & entering, 2 counts tresspassing, theft (matches), vandalism. He was released on a monitor with- gal assigned because i wanted to get him in an inpatient evaluation.- psychiatrist said it sounded manic and could have been agitated by recent increase in prozac, so medications were switched to mood stabilizer. then while home trrying to get adjusted to mood stabilizer, he starts having more mood swings and stays up 36 hours staright then crashes for 16 hrs. During the time awake, i become at wits end with- waiting on courts, gal, etc (this had been 8 weeks), so i called police and asked to have son tdo's to hospital. Son hid in closet, we found him, police say they can't tdo him. psychiatrist says this was reaction to mood stabilizer. then i find out he can't go in for inpatient evaluation because no one will pay for it. we went to court as scheduled and gal starts telling judge he broke his rules for being on monitor because i had called police, was not adequately supervised (he'd been on computer looking at porn), i was not agreeable with school (because i had appealed their decisions), psychiatrist and i kept switching medications around and blaming his behavior on medications, and i had not provided adequate health care to prevent this occurrence because i had not kept him with- therapist. so, he got put back in detention with- no medications and they have social services lined up to determine placement after they do a comp evaluation and difficult child and i were told he might never come back home. the details on that are on my last post. what do i do? have i been an unfit parent? the attny i hired spoke with- gal but it seems the gal convinced the attny that there was reason to fear that he is a danger to society. the police didn't think so, and he didn't meet the criteria of hospital or ins co for acute care. why did gal twist things around in front of judge? she had acted like we were on the same wavelength before we walked into court. i'm supposed to sign release forms for EVERYTHING for social services. no one is telling me what to expect- do any of you know if i should expect that he'll never come back home? the attny kept confusing an inpatient evaluation with Residential Treatment Center (RTC) when talking with- me last so i don't know now if that's what gal is trying to get. i told attny that if he was determined to be a danger to self or others, i would want him in someplace appropriate, just like i did last year, but that this had not been established now and it should be determined after a re-evaluation by psychiatrist/psychiatric- it should not be determined by lawyers and i don't think gal should be punishing difficult child through the process of her learning difficult child's history and talking to psychiatrists. after what she did before, i'm afraid to talk to gal or social services because i'm afraid things will be taken out of context or twisted around again to help them achieve what they want. I feel like dumping all the paperwork from sd, hospital, documents i've written trying to stand up for him and get him help, onto gal and social services desks. but, i am paranoid about report from pysch test last year because instead of her clarifying the tire swing incident, she wrote "sets fires". now that difficult child has a felony arson charge, what does that look like and where is that going to lead? also, in the chart of parent provided info it says he "sometimes is cruel to animals" - i don't know where that came from- i either filled in the wrong circle on one of those 500 questions or she took my statement that when he rages, even our dogs run as being cruel to animals. has anyone ever been through anything like this? i told attny that i think i should get difficult child a better defense attny because court appointed one isn't doing anything. the attny said he can't do anything but have a comp evaluation done, which is happening on friday. i think there has to be a way to let the judge know that gal is twisting things around and that difficult child can become stable again and should not be locked away or taken away from home. also, if comp evaluation says he's not comp- does that mean Residential Treatment Center (RTC)? does the person doing comp evaluation determine if he's a danger to society? God bless anyone who has taken the time to read all this!!!