welcometowitsend
Member
He texted me today and asked me for our previous addresses (was pretty rude about it too, but, whatever) . I was busy and had to drive so I told him I'd call him later.
So I called him around dinner time and I did a good job of being very friendly. Turns out he's been kicked out of the place where he was staying. He went from being part of the family to getting kicked out. I'm not surprised. He says "That's ok, it's happened before." No kidding - felt like asking him who the common denominator was? but I was a good girl and kept my mouth shut. I did tell him that I still considered him part of my family.
He is staying with the first friend he crashed with in November & the first half of December. Not sure if they'll let him stay or not. I think their plan is likely for him to stay temporarily until he can get on social assistance and get his own place to live.
So, I guess he has finally decided to get off his butt and apply for social assistance. I'm not sure he will even get it because he has to meet their qualifications. He has to be attending school full time. I'm not sure if they look at his past attendance or only his attendance once he is on SA. Then he either has to have someone like a Guidance Counsellor state that they believe he is being abused or we have to tell SA that he is not allowed to come home. It can't be just because he can't follow the rules.
This will be interesting to see how this plays out. If he claims abuse and we get investigated by Children's Aid and there is any trauma to easy child I may have a very hard time getting past that - I know husband and easy child will. I know in the long run we will be clear of any suspicion but in the short term it could be scary. To think that he might do that just so he can do whatever he wants, whenever he wants is making me angry already.
If SA calls me and asks why we kicked him out I will tell them the truth. He wouldn't go to school, was disrespectful and wouldn't follow any of our rules. If he chooses to get counselling, shows us a change in attitude and is willing to follow rules and show respect he can come back - but not before. He probably won't qualify if I tell them that. I will also tell them that I have concerns for easy child as I caught difficult child with incestuous pornography on his computer. That may qualify him because we are not sure if we want him to come back because of that. I know he's never touched her and it was probably just stupid adolescent curiosity but with all the other behaviour thrown in it makes me nervous and would keep me on guard. easy child does have a lock on her bedroom door (automatically locks so she doesn't even have to remember).
I told difficult child he was a very resourceful young man and I knew he could figure things out. Told him I loved him and said I'd love to hear from him and ended the conversation.
Anyway, it's always something new and interesting with a difficult child.
So I called him around dinner time and I did a good job of being very friendly. Turns out he's been kicked out of the place where he was staying. He went from being part of the family to getting kicked out. I'm not surprised. He says "That's ok, it's happened before." No kidding - felt like asking him who the common denominator was? but I was a good girl and kept my mouth shut. I did tell him that I still considered him part of my family.
He is staying with the first friend he crashed with in November & the first half of December. Not sure if they'll let him stay or not. I think their plan is likely for him to stay temporarily until he can get on social assistance and get his own place to live.
So, I guess he has finally decided to get off his butt and apply for social assistance. I'm not sure he will even get it because he has to meet their qualifications. He has to be attending school full time. I'm not sure if they look at his past attendance or only his attendance once he is on SA. Then he either has to have someone like a Guidance Counsellor state that they believe he is being abused or we have to tell SA that he is not allowed to come home. It can't be just because he can't follow the rules.
This will be interesting to see how this plays out. If he claims abuse and we get investigated by Children's Aid and there is any trauma to easy child I may have a very hard time getting past that - I know husband and easy child will. I know in the long run we will be clear of any suspicion but in the short term it could be scary. To think that he might do that just so he can do whatever he wants, whenever he wants is making me angry already.
If SA calls me and asks why we kicked him out I will tell them the truth. He wouldn't go to school, was disrespectful and wouldn't follow any of our rules. If he chooses to get counselling, shows us a change in attitude and is willing to follow rules and show respect he can come back - but not before. He probably won't qualify if I tell them that. I will also tell them that I have concerns for easy child as I caught difficult child with incestuous pornography on his computer. That may qualify him because we are not sure if we want him to come back because of that. I know he's never touched her and it was probably just stupid adolescent curiosity but with all the other behaviour thrown in it makes me nervous and would keep me on guard. easy child does have a lock on her bedroom door (automatically locks so she doesn't even have to remember).
I told difficult child he was a very resourceful young man and I knew he could figure things out. Told him I loved him and said I'd love to hear from him and ended the conversation.
Anyway, it's always something new and interesting with a difficult child.