Five Years Ago Today...

Discussion in 'Parent Emeritus' started by AnnieO, Mar 27, 2018.

  1. AnnieO

    AnnieO Shooting from the Hip

    ...I stood up to Belle, and as a result she moved out of our home. Stopped allowing her to emotionally and verbally abuse me... Stopped putting up with her garbage.

    I should never have allowed her back in, but I did. I'm a forgiving sort.

    But you know what? I'm proud of myself for standing up.

    Now that Belle and Pat are both out of our lives, things are much more peaceful. We have more disposable income... And we are raising a strong, independent, loving little girl.

    *sigh* It is bitter sweet. I love Belle and Pat... But I do not like or trust them. And I won't let Belle back in - ever.
     
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  2. BloodiedButUnbowed

    BloodiedButUnbowed Active Member

    Thanks for this story of strength and survival, AnnieO. We are estranged from both of my stepsons now, by their choice as we are not custodial parents. Your story gives me hope for a calm and peaceful life with my spouse regardless of what the children are doing.
     
  3. recoveringenabler

    recoveringenabler Well-Known Member Staff Member

    I remember when Belle moved out. You've been thru a lot with Belle and Pat and you've come out the other side with some peace...... and beautiful little Rose.....geez 5 years old already.....I remember when she was born!!

    These milestones can be an odd mixture of "bittersweet" and celebration....(I know).....you worked hard for your peacefulness..........enjoy!
     
  4. RN0441

    RN0441 100% better than I was but not at 100% yet

    Annie

    Can't imagine how it must feel to go through it all over again when you thought she was now stable. Child in tow and one on the way.

    You are a strong woman.

    Hugs and prayers that things stay calm for you!
     
  5. SomewhereOutThere

    SomewhereOutThere Well-Known Member

    Annie, I remember how hard you and Bill tried and tried. You are so strong. Is Bill okay? I worry more about him as I am more familiar with YOU and know your ability to get through anything. Is Bill like you? Strong?
     
  6. Littleboylost

    Littleboylost On the road unwanted to travel

    Annie
    The decision we make to let go with life is so very difficult. We know in our hearts it’s the right thing to do, to love and not enable.
    I am so happy to hear it brings you peace, securty and a stabelxonvironment for the little.
    Sending you strength and hope.
     
  7. magnolia26

    magnolia26 ... the sound of an iron trap door closing ...

    I just wanted to send support and strength. I've cut my daughter out of my life as well. I have always been firm, always set boundaries, didn't allow abuse -- which all made her a better liar. Good luck and God's blessings to you.
     
  8. AnnieO

    AnnieO Shooting from the Hip

    He's far more firm in his resolve than I am. As far as he is concerned, she doesn't even exist anymore. I don't know, but I think that is the only way that he can sleep. KNOWING he did everything he could.
     
  9. New Leaf

    New Leaf Well-Known Member

    My two are out there, somewhere, finding their way. It has been three years now since I stood up and said enough. Not an easy thing to do, Annie, and live with......but the ulterior, to continue as is and suffer right along with the chaos and drama is simply unacceptable. It is a hard pill to swallow when the kids grow up and go off the rails. What can one do? Their choices.
    I am glad you have peace in your life and you have Belle, what a blessing.
    Like you, I love Rain and Tornado, but I do not like or trust them.
    Soldier on sweet lady, stay strong and keep putting one foot in front of the other.
    (((HUGS)))
    Leafy