Thanks so much everyone. I don't feel very good though. I wish I could have gotten out-patient intervention. difficult child is still over at the crisis center being watched by cops while paperwork is being done. Then, they have to wait for sheriff's to come and transport him. They don't need a hearing because he's a minor and I'm willing to sign him in once they get him there. He'll go back to same psychiatric hospital he's always gone to, it looks like. (FYI- beds are typically open mid-week
) Anyway, I asked if I should go ahead and come home to get his clothes together so I could take them to psychiatric hospital and not have to come back home to get them- psychiatric hospital is about a 30 min drive for me.
Really, I came home because I was about to go into tears. My heart is broken. difficult child is saying he feels this way and is doing these things because he hates his home. I know part of it is lashing out but part of it is truly because our homelife hoovers right now. We're living with the holes in the walls (which Star told me how to fix- I had wanted to start around Christmas), but still, we've been living with them a while, we have no money- you know a lot of this- ok all, pretty much- is due to difficult child's legal and mental health issues, but I don't tell him that but it still doesn't make it easier or more comfrotable. Then, it keeps getting worse because I can't get to work when he can't get to school.
On top of that, the counselor over there told me the school could have and should have done something before it got to this point. He said they had more options than just the county team and didn't they ever discuss any of that with me? NO! And I even asked the principal if there were any other options that she knew of. The guy also told me that there was more than enough reason to have difficult child in a psychiatric hospital right now.
Then, the guy proceeds to tell me that if difficult child was on a chins (child in need of services), we could get the help we needed. Really? My son is already on a chins. GAL only offered 2 things- I could sign over custody of my son- NO GO. Then she recommended MST. PO said MST was only option for help. What do I find out tonight? Either of these people could have gotten more services for us at any time and it would have been easy because difficult child was already on a chins.
He also said that they (county mental health ) could be providing the mental health part- I did jump in on that and said NO- it's ok- I'm already getting that provided for him.
I just want to cry. So, I guess I can get an advocate to hold the principal's feet to the fire from now on about school services/iep accommodations. But, who and how do I get to hold the PO's feet to the fire? If the defense attny had known these services were that easy to get under those circumstances, we could have asked judge for them and maybe she would have granted that and ordered them.
Well, difficult child is an anxiety ridden basket case right now- sitting over there saying how much he hates home and that he knew he was going to end up back at psychiatric hospital. But to think that it didn't have to get to this point and I had access to services but the people in the safety net blocked them or never let on that I had that access.....The problem is I don't have direct access- I have to get the referrals from these people who don't even mention the opportunity for these services, much less refer them for us.
Geez....I'm speechless now. Ok one more thought LOL! Right now, in my emotional state of mind, I think ideally difficult child should stay some place safe and well-structured for a few mos while I get this house and personal finances in order then I should put the house on the market, he should come home, and we should move out of this county quickly. I had thoughts like this last year, but now I am convinced. These people here are not even trying to work for the best interest of the child. They want to hold our feet to the fire- but look at how they turned their backs to providing help when he has qualified for it since being put on a chins 18 mos ago and not one single person has mentioned one option to me other than signing custody over to social services- who said they had to look at giving custody to another family member first- or this MST guy who wanted to take over difficult child's mental health treatment plan (ie- treatment for bipolar) and his iep and put difficult child and myself on a behavioral contract. And I had no faith in that guy- he was rude and arrogant and was not consistent with what he told me. That's it- ARGHHH....