I feel toxic...WARNING: Not for the faint of heart

[Kjs]

OMG..I thought I found an old post of mine! been there done that. Glad to hear from everyone that it their experience is 11 -12.
Went through that last year. Found them in the garbage can. Now I have to stand their and watch. Then check the mouth.

I sure hope things settle down for you. It is so frustrating when they do these things.

Keeping you in my thoughts.

 

[ML]

I feel for you. I totally agree about sending her to Nana's and also screening your calls. My difficult child will call me from his dad's constantly crying to come home. In his case I think it's about transitions and discomfort but I *need* that break for a few hours. I'm so sorry you're going through this and you are a terrific mom!! hugs, MicheleL

 

[Just keep swimming]

Hi,

I haven't read all the other responses, so forgive me if this is redundant. I noticed in your signature that difficult child loves animals. Have you tried equine therapy yet? Aly has been going for about 6 months now and it has helped her is so many unexpected ways it is unbelieveable. We now have 2 goats (expecting twins each) and 2 horses that are majorly kid friendly. She will got out and groom our horses for hours or sit and sing to them or walk them on the property. It has helped her understand about respecting something much bigger than herself and in turn has helped her be more respectful to us, her parents.

She has never been medication non compliant, and I have no idea if this would help, but I would certainly look into it!!

Good luck to you!!

Hugs,
Vickie

 

[flutterbee]

Well, I got a good night's sleep and am in a much better frame of mind today.

I do hold up a mirror to her. I don't do the victim mentality at all. It almost always involves more accusations of being mean to her, not caring, etc., with some 'you just don't understand' thrown in. BUT, it has worked in the long run. I've noticed in the last year that she is really starting to check her behavior with friends and making a conscious effort to weigh her words instead of just blurting things out. I think her recent statements of noone liking her are a manifestation of her depression (which fuels her anxiety even more). It's a familiar cop out. I mean, she went to the fair a couple of weeks ago with friends, ran into more friends and had a great time. 5 minutes later (literally), she was crying and said she didn't have any friends. :hammer:

I know I'm not always going to please her and I'm ok with that. Hell, I'm used to it. :its_all_good: It's her constant demands to please her that wear me down. Like I said in an earlier post, she's way too dependent on me. She always has been. My favorite (but not only..far from it) example of this is that she could tie her shoes at the babysitter's for a year before she could tie them at home. I don't encourage it. She's a stubborn little thing. NO idea where she gets that from. :devil:

sweetiegirlz - difficult child + not medication complaint = this thread. :wink: I've had sooo much trouble getting difficult child to take her medications, but other members of this board have a lot of experience with success in that area. They'll be able to offer you really good ideas.

As always, I'm so thankful for this board. You ladies are a godsend. Last night I was fluctuating between being so frustrated that I couldn't stand myself to crying. I don't know what I would do if I didn't have this outlet and the support of all of you. :flower:

 

[branbran]

You poor thing. I so know what you are going through, my difficult child has refused to take her medications on and off for the past 5 years. I just think they want to be normal and taking medications isn't "normal". My daughter is 16 and has been on medications since she was 7 and she is still in denial. In her mind we are all doing this to her, there is nothing wrong with her other than the fact that I as well as anyone else in her life who has tried to help her, has ruined her life. I am still waiting for the day she comes to grips with the fact that she is mentally ill. She is in her third Residential Treatment Center (RTC) and she just thinks it's a punishment of some sort. I have tried every way possible to explain to her that this is to help her, but she doesn't think she needs help. I too feel frustrated all of the time, angry, resentment, and every other negative feeling there is. I just think it comes with the territory. So don't get down on yourself, what you are dealing with is extraordinary, and unfortunately these children do not come with a handbook!! So keep fighting the good fight. Hang in there. I hope tomorrow will be a bit more sunny for you. God bless.

 

[Steely]

:crazy:
Sending you BIG hugs. I know, I know. It is all so hard. I am too tired from my new job to say much more, but I wanted you to know that I care, and you are in my thoughts. I have been and still am, exactly where you are.