welcometowitsend
Member
That is what difficult child said to me last night. I tried to call him yesterday to see if he got the issues with his drama class group worked out the night before. I was genuinely hoping that this was a topic we could actually have a decent conversation around because it's the only thing he has told me about in his life in the last 3 months. Otherwise it's just been him telling me how horrible I am and me trying to have a normal conversation. Ugh.
So I texted him because he didn't answer my call. I got back the usual "What do you care?" So I responded with "You're my son, I love you and I do care." "Whatever, I find that hard to believe." "You can't even make one small sacrifice for me that isn't even any work for you." This was a reference to me not lying for him so he could get SA. I responded by telling him that I've made lots of sacrifices for him in his life and I've done so willingly because I love him.
Anyway, he just carried on berating me and telling me how horrible I am and then said "I want you out of my life. I don't want a relationship with you at all." His thinking is that if I'm not doing something for him or giving him money then why should he bother with me.
Then he said something that made me wonder... "Lucky for me you have to support me until I'm 18." I asked him what he meant by that but he refused to answer. I'm wondering if he's got something up his sleeve or the lady that he is staying with (his friends' mom) is helping him hire a lawyer to try and sue me for support? It is my understanding that if he is out of the house by his own choices then after the age of 16 I don't have to support him.
It was strange. If he does come after me for money it'll likely be the last money he gets from us. We may just change our wills and his college money will go to easy child or his cousins or both.
I still told him I loved him and that I was doing my best to make an effort to have a relationship with him. My final texts to him were "OK well I'm going to tell you again that I love you and want a relationship with you. Enjoy using the phone that I pay for. Maybe it will occur to you to call me sometime using it. I'd like that." I know it was kind of sarcastic but I was so hurt that he would say those things to me.
Anyway, I'm thinking of giving him what he wants for a while. husband wants me to turn his phone off but I don't know if I can handle doing that. I am thinking of not contacting him for a while and just waiting to see what happens. He's made it very clear that's what he wants so maybe I should honour his wishes. Or maybe he's just too immature to realize the gravity of what he is asking for and I should keep trying. I don't know. What do you think?
So I texted him because he didn't answer my call. I got back the usual "What do you care?" So I responded with "You're my son, I love you and I do care." "Whatever, I find that hard to believe." "You can't even make one small sacrifice for me that isn't even any work for you." This was a reference to me not lying for him so he could get SA. I responded by telling him that I've made lots of sacrifices for him in his life and I've done so willingly because I love him.
Anyway, he just carried on berating me and telling me how horrible I am and then said "I want you out of my life. I don't want a relationship with you at all." His thinking is that if I'm not doing something for him or giving him money then why should he bother with me.
Then he said something that made me wonder... "Lucky for me you have to support me until I'm 18." I asked him what he meant by that but he refused to answer. I'm wondering if he's got something up his sleeve or the lady that he is staying with (his friends' mom) is helping him hire a lawyer to try and sue me for support? It is my understanding that if he is out of the house by his own choices then after the age of 16 I don't have to support him.
It was strange. If he does come after me for money it'll likely be the last money he gets from us. We may just change our wills and his college money will go to easy child or his cousins or both.
I still told him I loved him and that I was doing my best to make an effort to have a relationship with him. My final texts to him were "OK well I'm going to tell you again that I love you and want a relationship with you. Enjoy using the phone that I pay for. Maybe it will occur to you to call me sometime using it. I'd like that." I know it was kind of sarcastic but I was so hurt that he would say those things to me.
Anyway, I'm thinking of giving him what he wants for a while. husband wants me to turn his phone off but I don't know if I can handle doing that. I am thinking of not contacting him for a while and just waiting to see what happens. He's made it very clear that's what he wants so maybe I should honour his wishes. Or maybe he's just too immature to realize the gravity of what he is asking for and I should keep trying. I don't know. What do you think?