T
toughlovin
Guest
Sigh.... I guess it is good they don't allow swearing on this board or you would all be getting an earful!! I got a call from the sober house this morning... took me out of my weight watchers meeting. Anyway they have a bunch of new residents so they did a top to bottom cleaning of the house. Under my sons mattress they found rolling papers and visine. Definitely not a good sign. He also has been having an attitude and got mad at a relapse prevention meeting and walked out of the meeting and the house!!!! So they are done. They are giving him and us until Monday to figure out what to do.
I told them he cannot come home. I can't do that to my daughter or to us. That if he wants to do what he wants then he needs to figure out how to do that. If he wants to find another sober house he can do that. We will only support him financially if he is doing stuff to make progress. They did say they can take him to this shelter, I think it is a homeless shelter. I told him they might want to plan on doing that. If he wants to come back here we may give him his mileage so he can get a free ticket but that is it. He needs to make a plan and do it, we are not coming into rescue him.
I am so angry and so frustrated. Nancy I keep thinking of you and what you have been through.. .our difficult children sound so similar. They don't think he has been smoking pot because he is passing the drug tests. They think he has been using Spice which is an incense that gives pot like effects but is chemical and probably more dangerous. But we need to let him go and fall and fail and if he ends up in jail so be it. I can not help him if he does not want to help himself.
Gosh think of us, give me strength to stay strong and give my husband strength for him to stay on the same page as me. I am really clear he can't come home and will stay with that for the sake of my daughter.... I am not going to put her in the position of having him here at home again. That would be very detrimental for her.
Ugh..... I really hate this.
I told them he cannot come home. I can't do that to my daughter or to us. That if he wants to do what he wants then he needs to figure out how to do that. If he wants to find another sober house he can do that. We will only support him financially if he is doing stuff to make progress. They did say they can take him to this shelter, I think it is a homeless shelter. I told him they might want to plan on doing that. If he wants to come back here we may give him his mileage so he can get a free ticket but that is it. He needs to make a plan and do it, we are not coming into rescue him.
I am so angry and so frustrated. Nancy I keep thinking of you and what you have been through.. .our difficult children sound so similar. They don't think he has been smoking pot because he is passing the drug tests. They think he has been using Spice which is an incense that gives pot like effects but is chemical and probably more dangerous. But we need to let him go and fall and fail and if he ends up in jail so be it. I can not help him if he does not want to help himself.
Gosh think of us, give me strength to stay strong and give my husband strength for him to stay on the same page as me. I am really clear he can't come home and will stay with that for the sake of my daughter.... I am not going to put her in the position of having him here at home again. That would be very detrimental for her.
Ugh..... I really hate this.