Looking at hospitalization..... :(

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by troubledheart, May 22, 2009.

  1. troubledheart

    troubledheart New Member

    ( i am sorry i don't know all the abbreviations yet)

    My son is in trouble again. Daily now. Outbursts, blaming others, hiding in bathrooms, seeing things that are not there, hearing things that are not there. I am slowing going insane. I am so depressed. we had almost 3 years of manageable behavior. Now in 3 short weeks, he has turned into a monster. They are keeping him in school today, barring physical violence, to try to teach him that he doesn't just get to go home when he has a bad day. Good luck to the teachers.....

    I called a treatment place, and have therapy appointment in a little over a week for a referral. Man, I just thought that we could get thru this.

    I am so bummed, I am getting married in July, how am I supposed to handle all of this?

    I am thinking of getting therapy myself......
  2. SomewhereOutThere

    SomewhereOutThere Well-Known Member

    Hi there and I'm really sorry.

    Have his medications been changed at all? That can change behavior.

    If he is hallucinating, he isn't being "bad"--he is ill. If he was controlled before, it can and probably will happen again. (((Hugs))) to you and your boy.
  3. graceupongrace

    graceupongrace New Member


    So sorry he's not doing well. I can't speak to the hallucinations, but in general... Has he had a recent growth spurt? When my difficult child was that age, he was growing so fast that we had to monitor his medications very closely to keep up with him. One time I was really baffled by the sudden change in his behavior, and it turns out he had simply outgrown his dosages. An increase did the trick. We ended up visiting psychiatrist more often during that period so we could make sure the dose matched his body mass. Hormonal changes can be a factor at that age too. Adolescence and difficult child-ness do not make a great combination.

    Hugs to you!
  4. therese005us

    therese005us New Member

    Sorry you are having troubles with your DS. My 19yo is on respirdal and when he wasn't complying with the tablet form, this happened to him. Now he has fortnightly needles. I don't think that would be an option for a 12yo but maybe you want to check he is taking his medications? Just a thought. I agree also, that hormone changes through growth spurts would have a bearing on how his system copes with the medication. I really hope you get a solution fast for all your sakes. there is a light though, for me, my DS it has taken about six months to see a change in him - he is so much more settled now than when he first came home.
    Good luck, and we'll be looking out for an update.
  5. Andy

    Andy Active Member

    Sounds like your son is crying for help. He doesn't like how he feels and doesn't know how to explain it. His outbursts are fighting off his feelings - not to be mean to anyone or anything but trying to express fear and frustration about his health.

    Has he ever been hospitalized before or will this be a new experience for you? I would suggest not even waiting for the therapy session. You can call the hospital and set up an appointment for an assessment. Or, take him to an ER for an emergency evaluation that will open the door to a psychiatric hospital. When my difficult child needed it, I just walked into the psychiatric hospital and asked for an appointment. They saw how bad off he was and took us back immediately (I thought we would have time to eat lunch first).

    difficult child's therapist told us that he was only able to see him once per week and if we need more intense services that the psychiatric hospital was an option. He said we could either go to an ER to get admitted to the psychiatric hospital or call the psychiatric hospital to set up an appointment with the admissions staff. It was a block away from therapist so we just walked in.
  6. recovering doormat

    recovering doormat Lapsed CDer

    I second having him evaluated at a psychiatric hospital. Doesnt' mean they will admit him on the spot, but at least a psychiatrist will do a face to face evaluation and may be able to help you figure out where to start: like, is he getting a therapeutic dose of his medications, and are they the right medications? My difficult child 2 was hospitalized for the first time at age 9 for anxiety (he suffered from intense separation anxiety and would spend his hours at school trying to convince the administrators to let him go home, then he got physically aggressive with me and his younger sister) and did well for a while on a low dose of zoloft and risperadal. He is no longer on medications but it took years of trial and error to figure out that he was better off on nothing.

    I also strongly urge you to see a therapist as soon as possible, just so you can have the support at this stressful (happy and not so happy stress) time. I can only imagine the inner turmoil you are having at the prospect of getting married to the love of your life while your baby is in such pain. I am divorced after 19 years of marriage and the kids' issues were not the cause of the breakup, but they certainly added a layer of stress. You need someone to talk to who has no agenda except helping you.

    Good luck to you and keep us posted.
  7. Wiped Out

    Wiped Out Well-Known Member Staff Member

    I'm sorry difficult child is struggling so much right now. It does seem like hospitalization would be a good option at this time, I know the decision is never easy.

    Getting therapy for yourself is also a good idea. It's one of the best decisions I've made, it's hard raising kids like ours as much as we love them, so getting help is not a sign of weakness. Hugs.
  8. troubledheart

    troubledheart New Member

    Here it is Tuesday. After Memorial Day weekend. He had a great weekend. He didn't smart off, back talk, argued a little, but that is to be expected with his age. I was very impressed with how he did.

    Now, school again today. He go into an argument with the teacher over what date today was. Walked out of class again, swearing and screaming that everyone at that school is out to "get him" to make him miserable. But they are not. They just want him to do his work, which he is refusing.

    I don't understand the difference. I want to just take him up to the hospital, but they said that they need a referral from his doctors.

    :ashamed: Why??????? I am a mess....why is he doing this? Why is he fine on the weekends (except for the fact that he is alone, with some kids at the campground that don't know him, that don't judge him that he plays with)
  9. troubledheart

    troubledheart New Member

    Oh, and yes he has had 3 hospital and 1 residential treatment. I need an emergency appointment, but i cannot get him in. they are booked at his therapist office!!!

    And yes, a recent growth spurt.
  10. lizzie09

    lizzie09 lizzie

    Hello Susan

    I am really sorry...I have suffered quite a bit like you are now and it is devastating,,I havent much to offer as my son is older but I want to offer you support and hugs
  11. Christy

    Christy New Member

    So sorry your facing this. We are in a similar place with our son. The combination of a growth spurt and the season change has brought on mania and he is currently hospitalized. It's been a difficult 12 days and he does not seem to be improving. Hang in there. If he is a being violent, you may need to go to the ER for an evaluation.
  12. troubledheart

    troubledheart New Member

    I just want to say thanks to all the support. It really means a lot knowing that others know what I am talking about and not looking at me like an alien and a "bad" parent.

    So far, he has not been more violent than trying to kick in a door at school, but they seem to catch him before (like when he is chaseing down a kid) it gets to that point.

    I am having such a terrible time finding any psychiatrist here. I have an emergency call into his therapist right now, for some much needed advice that cannot wait till our appointment on monday.

    I asked the school to keep him in the EBD room for the rest of the week with 1 on 1 support for him until our IEP meeting on Monday for a new BIP, but they have refused, because they think he can handle things but will keep a close eye on him, between his part time aide and Special Education classes. When will the schools ever learn. He is not doing well with peers, and it is unsafe for him to be around anyone? Am I being overprotective?