my son is in icu

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by PiscesMom, Dec 6, 2017.

  1. PiscesMom

    PiscesMom Active Member

    last night the voices in my son's head told him to kill himself. he took a handful ? of aspirin and called 911. (he lives with his dad) the ambulance and police came.
    i spent all day sitting by his bedside, being there. he didn't talk much at all, he's a very quiet person. but when the nurse pulled me out to get info, he said "mom, she's going to show you inside my head from the chip in my brain."
    the psychiatrist came and asked him questions. he called for zoloft and risperdal.
    tomorrow they will either send him to the behavioral floor or another facility.
    a "sitter" is with him at all times.
    he can hear again. his kidneys are not functioning perfectly. the levels (of salicylate?) are going down, and that's good, the nurse said. his vitals are good.

    he loves care when he gets afraid, but he doesn't follow thru on his treatment plan.

    so - this voices and chip in his head first started in august, and he's been in er twice since then, once for an overnight, then the time before this they sent him home because he continues to smoke weed, so it is "voluntary psychosis." and now this, the suicide attempt.

    his dad said he'd NEVER give him weed again. i hope he means that. is that what this is? just too much using, and the autistic traits? or does this sound like he is developing a very serious mental illness? i probably asked this question back in august, i should scroll back, but now he is self harming. he is a danger to himself.

    and what can i expect from the system? a week in post acute, and a release? i remember on his release papers from the first time - "prognosis:fair" - something like that, even tho my son left the place fully intending to turn his life around.

    i don't know anywhere else i can go where people will understand what i am going thru than everyone here.

    and what do i say at work? nobody knows i have a son. do you all just say nothing, because you don't want to say too much? even at "oh, what high school did he go to?" i don't know how to answer that question.
  2. Sam3

    Sam3 Active Member

    I am so sorry.

    There are people here with knowledge about schizophrenia and pscyhoses. But I did want to mention that I had read about long acting anti-psychotic medications (2x month), that makes medication compliance easier.

    Hopefully someone can develop a Norplant type thing for these serious conditions.
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  3. SomewhereOutThere

    SomewhereOutThere Well-Known Member

    The "harmless" pot can trigger latent schizophrenia. Your ex was an idiot to let him use it.

    How old is this son? If you need to take off work, you need to tell higher ups why. Be matter of fact. "He doesn't live with me so I never spoke of him much." Thats all. You dont need to explain in detail. Less is more. Who cares what they think? "What you think of me is none of my business." You have bigger issues than that.

    If he has a psychotic illness, he will need anti psychotics and, as Sam said, they do have shots that last a month. I socialize with and work as a leader in a mental health group, mostly young people, and some folks take the shot and the ones I know who take it are doing well. Not psychotic now.

    Keep us updated. I am so so so very sorry.
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    Last edited: Dec 6, 2017
  4. Littleboylost

    Littleboylost On the road unwanted to travel

    First I am so very sorry. Second how awful that tou have not a single soul to confide in and help You through this. I am so very glad you are here.

    I am a nurse and I will share some knowledge and some personal experience.

    My sons drug of choice is weed. He goes psychotic on weed alone and it drives me twisted when people minimize the perils of weed. I was certain he had MH issues along with his addiction. He is wild wild! fabricates and lives in his own version of reality. And when he does not use he is very sane and behaves normally. It is very frightening.

    There are clinical studies that indeed show that weed can induce schizophrenic psychosis. 80% of which resolves when they stop using weed. The other 20% have an unregulated underlying schizophrenia that requires medication to control. Do not let the term fair concern you. It is one of those dry fence sitting clinical terms often used by physicians.

    My best friend had a psychotic break 10 years ago. It was very severe. He husband tried to ignore it. She attempted to chop off her own thumb as they had instituted a thumb scan at her place of work and she was insistent that it had implanted an evil chip in her body. She also tried to bludgeon the family pet as it had a chip from the vet that was also an evil entity. I convinced her husband to take her to the hospital. She was admitted to ICU also. She is on a medication regimen and is doing very very well. She is a loving mother and full time nurse.

    Do not get too disheartened by all of this. Is there a mixed disorders clinic in his area that he could go to? Once he is stable MH wise do you feel he will need rehab to help him understand the need to steer clear of drugs with his vulnerabilities?

    Do not get too disheartened, he can improve and the majority do.

    His father needs a swift kick in the aaaasssss. What a jerk.

    When people ask about my son I say he is fishing his path in life. None of their business otherwise.

    Big hugs to you. Know you are not alone.
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  5. GoingNorth

    GoingNorth Crazy Cat Lady

    The shots shouldn't be given until it is proven that the patient does well on that medication, and enough time has passed that there is no risk of adverse reactions. You can discontinue an oral medication. It's pretty hard to discontinue a time-release injection.

    The "chip in my head", etc., sounds like paranoid schizophrenia. As SWOT said, in some cases marijuana use can trigger psychosis in a person prone to developing it.

    It is specifically the THC that can act in this way. CBD users do not have to worry about this.

    I'm sorry you are dealing with this. The problem is that even very sick individuals have rights, and unless proven to be a danger to themselves or others, (hard to do) can refuse treatment or medications.
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  6. Copabanana

    Copabanana Well-Known Member

    pisces mom. i am so sorry.

    how scary and lonely for you.

    i second and third the potential with medication and treatment. and i hate marijuana too.

    i tell too many people about my worries about my son. i cannot keep stuff bottled in. i find that people have compassion for me and for my son if they know some of the story.

    i had a co worker who had a psychotic break. a co worker gossiped about him revealing how proufoundly decompensated he had become. he was a psychotherapist. except for a certain vulnerabilty about him you would never guess he had a serious mental illness. i respected him greatly.

    i would guess that i have known many, many other people with psychosis in their stories. but it has been controlled and with this their functioning is restored.

    is your son on ssi? my son is.

    was it your son who himself called 911? this shows self-awareness and even insight. he did not want to hurt himself or intend too. i believe this might suggest a good prognosis. i hope so.

    i am sending prayers for his full recovery.
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    Last edited: Dec 7, 2017
  7. susiestar

    susiestar Roll With It

    I am so sorry that you are having to go through this. It is so hard to know how to deal with this sort of thing. I hope and pray that he is able to take this as a true wake up call and stay away from weed in all forms, and that this resolves all of his issues with psychosis.

    Remember to take care of yourself. You are truly important to so many people and none of us want to see you neglecting yourself.
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  8. Kalahou

    Kalahou Active Member

    Pisces, You have my thoughts and support. I can't begin to know what you are going through as I do not have any experience like this. We just do not know the answers. Do take care of yourself, and know that you will get though it somehow. The others above have given good insight and encouragement.
    Keep us posted, You are not alone here. Bless. The new day comes.
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  9. StillStanding

    StillStanding Active Member


    Long ago I gave myself permission to lie. When someone asks about my son I say he's doing well. When someone asks if he lives with me I say no he lives with a friend. I give details to doctors or welfare workers. Nobody else needs to know.

    This isn't because I've done anything wrong or because there's anything wrong with having mental illness. For me, I just don't want to talk about it with people who can't possibly understand.

    Good luck.
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  10. New Leaf

    New Leaf Well-Known Member

    PiscesMom, I am so very sorry for all that is happening, it is a hard place to be at with a beloved. Prayers going up for strength for you and recovery for your son.
    As for what to tell others, your personal business is none of theirs. You tell people what you are comfortable with.
    Extra long hugs. Do take good care of yourself. My heart goes out to you.
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  11. recoveringenabler

    recoveringenabler Well-Known Member Staff Member

    PiscesMom, I am so so sorry about your son....What a scary scenario for you to go through. As everyone has mentioned, don't neglect your own needs now, make sure you are supported and nurtured through this.

    I understand about what to say to others about your son......I opted to not share much with most folks, often rather than compassion, there was judgement...... and clearly, what is needed is empathy, kindness, understanding and compassion. If I am asked about my daughter my usual response is, "she's still struggling." Most often that ends any further dialogue.

    You may already be aware of NAMI, but just so you know, the National Alliance on Mental Illness may be able to provide you with information, resources, guidance and support. I'd encourage you to seek out support for YOU now. They have very good courses for parents.

    We're here for you PiscesMom, you're not alone....we'll circle the wagons around you....

    Sending prayers for your son, for you, for your family......big warm hugs for you.....
  12. RN0441

    RN0441 100% better than I was but not at 100% yet

    I also am so sorry you have to deal with all of this and that you and your son are suffering.

    There is no end in sight for many of us here. We are just doing all we can do to get by and try to find some peace and happiness as we can.

    I agree that I hate how some minimize the use of marijuana. I'm still good friends with some high school friends and we "passed the bong" many times but we all agree that it seems that the marijuana nowadays is not the same. So much stronger and seems to kick so many more off the rails!

    My son, like many, thinks it's absolutely heaven on earth and harmless, grows in the ground, etc. etc. but it did serious damage to him be opening him up to many other drugs and addiction. Also it's just so accepted in social media, on TV, movies, etc. it feels like a losing battle to even try to talk about the negative side of it.

    I often pray for all of us on this site because that makes me feel like I'm doing something positive. I do hope that there is a silver lining in all of this for you both.

    Keep us posted on how you are both doing.
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  13. BloodiedButUnbowed

    BloodiedButUnbowed Active Member

    I am so very sorry that you are experiencing this. I hope your son improves and complies with his treatment plan.

    Having lived through a suicide attempt nightmare this fall, I can relate.
  14. HMBgal

    HMBgal Active Member

    I can't add anymore wisdom than the wonderful people on here already have. Warm hugs to you and your boy is in a place where he can get the help he needs.
  15. PiscesMom

    PiscesMom Active Member

    Thank you!! Question - he has not had any weed since Tuesday night, when he was admitted to ER. (He stayed a few days, then went to a post acute place) He is not hearing any voices - the hospital put him on Zoloft and Risperdal, but the post acute place changed his medications to Haldol and Benztropine. But he is still convinced there is a chip in his brain, and many people are able to read his thoughts on a computer screen. Can weed psychosis last this long? His kidneys still have too much creatinine, but not too bad. The doctor said kidneys should recover in a few weeks, otherwise he is fine.
  16. PiscesMom

    PiscesMom Active Member

    I don't mention his existence at all at work. Oh, you have a son? He's 18, is he in college? What high school did he go to? I really like my coworkers, but there's no cheery small talk answer to general questions. And I tend to also reveal too much. I don't know - I am an introvert maybe that's why I am not good at small talk. If I start talking, I say too much. I don't want to make people feel bad or awkward, etc. I just said I had a sick kid.
    He is not on SSI. I don't know if he has a diagnosis.
    They released him, and recommended this outpatient place, for transitional youth, looks good.
    His father promised to never give him weed ever again. He called me frantic that night, tongue thick in his mouth. I hope he means it.
    And yes, my son called 911. He wanted the voices to go away, shoveled aspirin in his mouth, he told me he was going to numb out then hang.
    I had two sisters have psychosis, one with ADD drugs (prescribed) and the other from street drugs. Maybe it is not unusual?
    Anyway, thank you, and I hope your son is doing well. You had mentioned working on trauma another time. I find that interesting, as I am sure I am totally traumatized, adn have been for years.
  17. Copabanana

    Copabanana Well-Known Member

    pisces. hi.

    i couple days ago i googled mj is not uncommon. research differs as to whether it triggers incipient psychosis or is a primary trigger.

    what i read in either case was very encouraging. medications are improving by leaps and bounds. your son's insight (at a very early age) has already served him. as has your strong and loving bond.that is what i think.

    i am traumatzed too. lately my son sees it and treats me gently. he knows i have been terrorized and pushed beyond my limits. i wish he'd figured that out sooner. take care.

    he sounds like he is responding well. the brain takes time to heal. the medications take time to take full effect, i believe. the experience in itself has taxed his body and mind.
  18. PiscesMom

    PiscesMom Active Member

    thank you all so much for your replies. i read on my phone at the hospital, but i wasn't logged in. Nobody understands this quite like people here - I mean I do have people to talk to but its not exactly the same. I am grateful to you all, this site.
    Any advice on the fact that my daughters are afraid/don't like my son anymore. My daughter w autism/anxiety is locked in her room, not comfortable with him here.
    His dad is what he is; well meaning but checked out.
    I was going to bring him to his dad's Sunday night, not sure if I can have him at my house, leaving my younger daughter alone w him while I am at work. I know she is safe, but there was a time she wasn't safe alone w him. When he was violent at 13. It was a terrible time.
  19. PiscesMom

    PiscesMom Active Member

    He is very insightful, actually. We accidentally got into politics, and he got angry. Later he said I was right to reprimand him, that he had been going in "bad direction." He is so sincere. He is a lot like me, in his head a lot. I hope funding isn't cut for this outpatient thing, it looks good. (He is on Medicaid) And I hope he stays compliant to treatment. I hope, I hope. And I am afraid to hope.
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  20. PiscesMom

    PiscesMom Active Member

    Or maybe I should just have the girls be uncomfortable, feel unsafe in their house, because he shouldn't go back to his dad's? What if he tries this again?
    I can't send him back there.
    Last edited: Dec 9, 2017