meowbunny
New Member
I have situational/stress-related depression. Have suffered with it on and off for years. Most of the time, I can cope quite well when it hits me - a week or so on Lexapro, healthy diet and exercise and I'm fine. This time around, nothing is working.
I miss my old home and friends. I had a good business that I can't do here. I hate that I had to leave what I loved for the safety of myself and my child.
I can't find a job that pays even a semi-living wage - $10/hour is considered a good (???!!!!!) wage. I'm slowly healing from the gall bladder surgery - much slower than I'd like and the surgeon is concerned. Making noises about more tests and possible exploratory to see if there are adhesions.
The medical bills are rolling in and no medical insurance and I don't qualify for any type of assistance. Okay, I expected the hospital bill to be high. But sure wish someone would have warned me that I'd get bills from the surgeon and the anesthesiologist (yes, I knew these were coming), the hospital x-ray (!!) department, the hospital ER, the lab fees. I'm getting a new medical bill almost daily. Total so far is $53,000. I'm afraid to look at the mail - seems like a new bill comes daily. I have no way to pay this amount.
Oh, did I mention I now have a rash on side of my back that is not clearing up? I know I should see a doctor about it but the idea of one more bill is more than I can bear. I can't even afford to find a therapist here right now.
I have $4,000 left to my name. When it is gone, there is literally nothing left. I hate, hate, hate being in such a financial bind. I'm not used to it, Have never been there before.
I have never been so sad and miserable before in my life. I have actually considered suicide but all I would be doing is leaving my daughter with this mess and she would have even less of an idea of how to cope with it than I do.
I know there are no answers or real solutions. Heck, even filing for bankruptcy costs more than I can afford and something my pride won't even let me consider. (How's that for a Catch 22?)
Sometimes reality really does bite!
I miss my old home and friends. I had a good business that I can't do here. I hate that I had to leave what I loved for the safety of myself and my child.
I can't find a job that pays even a semi-living wage - $10/hour is considered a good (???!!!!!) wage. I'm slowly healing from the gall bladder surgery - much slower than I'd like and the surgeon is concerned. Making noises about more tests and possible exploratory to see if there are adhesions.
The medical bills are rolling in and no medical insurance and I don't qualify for any type of assistance. Okay, I expected the hospital bill to be high. But sure wish someone would have warned me that I'd get bills from the surgeon and the anesthesiologist (yes, I knew these were coming), the hospital x-ray (!!) department, the hospital ER, the lab fees. I'm getting a new medical bill almost daily. Total so far is $53,000. I'm afraid to look at the mail - seems like a new bill comes daily. I have no way to pay this amount.
Oh, did I mention I now have a rash on side of my back that is not clearing up? I know I should see a doctor about it but the idea of one more bill is more than I can bear. I can't even afford to find a therapist here right now.
I have $4,000 left to my name. When it is gone, there is literally nothing left. I hate, hate, hate being in such a financial bind. I'm not used to it, Have never been there before.
I have never been so sad and miserable before in my life. I have actually considered suicide but all I would be doing is leaving my daughter with this mess and she would have even less of an idea of how to cope with it than I do.
I know there are no answers or real solutions. Heck, even filing for bankruptcy costs more than I can afford and something my pride won't even let me consider. (How's that for a Catch 22?)
Sometimes reality really does bite!