So, No One Missed Me?


New Member
Hi family:

I have been lurking for awhile now.
I seem too tired after work and after work,"work".... :hypnosis:
Baby J has had his first birthday :bravo: :smile: :rofl:
He is walking and starting to try to talk. :bravo:
He is like a flower unfolding in front of us. Funny how I don't remember feeling like this about difficult child's childhood..... :smile:

difficult child is less than 90 days sober. She has had one pregnancy, one abortion and one relapse. She called her court appointed attorney on me last week stating that she wanted more visitations with her son. On top of all her drama she has admitted to me, that she is in no way shape or form prepared to be a mother. I don't get her, she is still sabotaging herself. Her current boyfriend, whom I like, is a recovering heroin addict, still relapsing, any reason will do :hammer:

I have been here night after night and on the sneak at work..lurking and unable to write (and writing is my hobby) :rolleyes:
I am, in 3 months, marrying the man of my dreams. I have never been happier in a relationship. He is wonderful and loves Baby J as his own,truly. :bravo:
It haunts me how difficult child helped kill my last relationship, although that never really was going to last, but she hastened it. :grrr:
I guess most of this belongs in the watercooler. I just feel comfortable here, with you guys.

The weird thing about difficult child is she seems like she is growing into a more mature times. Sometimes difficult child can still be a royal manipulative witch. She is only one slip up away from her next relapse. I keep waiting for it to come.

Melissa :angel:


Well-Known Member
Hey there!

I was just wondering the other day where you were and how Baby J was doing. Our lil ones are growing into toddlers now. I cant believe We sure had a bumper crop last year didnt we?

Glad things are going somewhat peacefully. Hope difficult child stays on her path and cant wait to hear about a wedding!


Well-Known Member
I've been wondering about you Melissa. I'm glad J is doing well. Mine is getting ready to turn one in June. He is talking and taking a few steps. Aren't they so much fun--of course, I get to give him back when it stops being fun!!! difficult child will be okay---hopefully she can stay clean---sometimes that's all you can ask. It's so sad that our hopes and dreams for our children have boiled down that they can stay sober just one more day. Hugs. Miss you.
Wow, reading your post is almost like flashing back 5 years... our beautiful granddaughter, 5 3/4, continues to unfold as well. Much drama with- mother. She turned tricks instead of dancing -- by God's grace got out of that in time before contracting AIDS (she thought she had but the retest came up negative) or some other STD or being murdered. (A few months back, when she'd been out on the street for a couple of months and no contact, there was a story on the news -- woman's body, unidentified, found in a dumpster. Raped and strangled. In Cicero (west Chicago), same area that she was last known to be running around in. I thought, My God, it's her. Called the police up there and learned that the age was wrong.)

She, too, admitted that she is completely unable to raise her daughter, when we went to court for guardianship; but still sometimes harbors ideas of getting her back and raising her on her own (ain't gonna happen).

She is 90 days sober, in Residential Treatment Center (RTC), now. She has matured alot this last time around, I think.

Thanks for the update. I don't know all the regulars but I do remember now that you were posting when I joined the board and I hadn't seen anything in a while.


Warrior Parent
:salute: Welcome Back, Melissa!

<span style='font-size: 14pt'><span style='font-family: Comic Sans MS'>Of Course We Missed You!! </span> </span>

Thanks for popping in, nice update about Baby J. Continued prayers for difficult child.



New Member
I missed you! Glad to see you back. I know that J is a bright light in your life. It sounds like difficult child at least realizes her current limitations. Prayers and good thoughts coming your way.

Hi Melissa.

Don't really know you enough to have missed ya, but hi anyways! Lots of prayers for your difficult child (recovery is a beast) and many blessings for your upcoming wedding (you sound so happy!).
You also sound tickled pink at "baby J's" milestones. I think that is just wonderful.

Nice to meetcha. Since finding this board, I have pretty much moved in. I never leave. Ever.

PS Steven Tyler DOES Rock...


New Member
Of course we missed you and I'm so happy to hear you are marrying the man of your dreams. Congratulations!!!!


Well-Known Member
Well, old Buddy Buddy, I know how little free time there is when
you work full time, have a full time significant other AND have
a Grandbaby (or YOU, LOL!). You just don't have
time to chit chat much. I figure NO news from you is surely GOOD
news! Sending supportive hugs. DDD

saving grace

New Member
I missed you, I kept meaning to research the site to see if I had been missing any posts, I dont get on regularly so I wasnt sure.

Thanks for checking in!



Active Member
hi ya. good update for the most part! glad you have someone to love you and stick by you. that is so important! hugs to the baby...oh yeah..the toddler!


Active Member
Wow Melissa, of course we missed you. Lurking and staying busy.....I'm with DDD, I like to think no news is good news!

Congratulations on getting married. Tell us all about the wedding.

My gbaby is 2 now. We go to mediation on Thursday with difficult child 1. He is so not stable. Or maybe this is as stable as it gets :smile:

Hope to hear more from you.


Spork Queen
Hey Melissa! Good to see you around. I rarely come to this forum, so I guess is was a six-sense. :smile:

Don't be a stranger!



Active Member
Melissa, of course we missed you! I'm just tickled about your upcoming wedding too. When are we all getting fitted for our bridesmaid dresses? I wonder if they'll be able to get enough of the same color dress for ALL of us. ROFL.

I have to apologize for being a bit MIA myself. There have been so many things going on over here, which is for another post, but just wanted you to know that I did miss seeing you, even if I haven't been posting much myself lately.

Can't wait to hear about the upcoming wedding, and am glad you have found happiness!



Well-Known Member
Hey Deb, you are absolutely right. It is time for the fittings
or at least to choose the dress. Since there will be at least
fifty of us for bridesmaids dresses, perhaps we could let Melissa
choose a dress pattern and material and then we can all choose the color that looks best on us?

Yeah! I like that idea. :smile:

We could be like a block long procession of all the colors of the
rainbow. How pretty would that be?? DDD

PS: I will NOT choose pink! :princess:


New Member
Well mellissa it sounds like yur life outside of difficult child issues is going well. I am glad you have found someone and that Baby J is doing well. Hopefully your difficult child will eventually grow up. Detach and protect that precious child. -RM


Well-Known Member
Hi Melissa,
I would Majorly miss not seeing you. I lurk too every so often and I Always, Always look for your posts.

and...guess what, I'll be a grandma like you soon too. Young difficult child, now 18, is expecting in Novemeber. Well, his new wife is. Yep, he got married in late April and baby is due beginning of November...I secrety hope for a girl. by the way, he joined the Army and is at Basic Training right now in Ft Benning GA. He graduates Aug 10th. We are so proud of far so good.

I hear ya on the relapsing. Next week will be my oldest difficult child's 20th birthday. He'll get out sometime in Aug-Oct and go to halfway house. I keep wondering how he will do, the AA meetings, counceling etc. Will he follow through this time and take his life seriously? I know you wish, hope, pray the same for your beautiful daughter and her future.

So glad to hear of your upcoming wedding plans. He sounds like a man you can lean on during the tough times and won't scare away easily. He's got to be a heck've a man. And you already are a wonderful woman yourself.

Well, enough from me for now.
I miss you and many others too.
hugs and care
ps...I will ALWAYS look for you whenever I check out the board.