Someone, please....help me....

[Marguerite]

Ask a vet. I'm willing to bet that the vet will be as puzzled by this attitude as you have been, Shari.

Certainly I am puzzled - I also grew up with cows. I also know with horses that when you call the vet and say that the horse is lame in it's left front leg, the vet knows to go to the leg that, when you stand behind the horse facing the head, is on YOUR left side also.

What about "stage right" and "stage left"? Even they are form the actor's point of view. So when Snagglepuss said, "Exit, stage left..." he would dash off to HIS left, not the audience's.

So even from a theatrical point of view, TwoBrooms has got it wrong.

What is the problem with her? Has she had an IQ bypass?

Marg

 

[susiestar]

As long as it isn't one more way for them to bring stupidity into your life. in my opinion they are greedy stupid idiots who didn't have any IQ to bypass because it all leaked out before birth.

What would happen if someone used hairdye and made them all the same color? Wouldn't THAT be funny to watch!

 

[donna723]

So, does their left/right theory only apply to cows, or is this for all other kinds of livestock too?

 

[SRL]

What about "stage right" and "stage left"? Even they are form the actor's point of view. So when Snagglepuss said, "Exit, stage left..." he would dash off to HIS left, not the audience's.

But these are cows and their eyes we're talking about, Marg, not actors. I'm thinking the solution is to name them using eye doctor lingo: Oculus Sinister (left eye) and Oculus Dexter (right eye). Shari could brand them OD and OS and just call them by their new pet names, Sinister and Dexter.

Problem solved!

 

[Marguerite]

SRL, there is still a problem - which one is Sinister, which one is Dexter? Because you can bet, TwoBrooms would have it the other way around.

I'm all for ear tags...

Marg

 

[AnnieO]

Has she had an IQ bypass?

OH MARG!!!! Can I steal this?????

 

[Shari]

JJJ as they were discussing the "which is which", the thought occurred to me, "are they seirously saying the cow's left isn't the same as our left" and then abandoned that thought because it just couldn't be right. After another minute or two, my brain clicked in and said "yes...that was a correct thought. OMG." Took my brain a bit, also!
***
IQ bypass...too funny. Possibly true. I would love to see this explained to a vet. I don't know if it applies to other animals or livestock. Here is my chance to have a little fun! (Mwahahahahaha) Even a car has a right and a left side! Oh, this is gonna be good. I will report back on this.
***
Susie, you know I'd do hair dye in a moment. Would that not be funny?!!?! Oh...wait...solid blacks are worth more than the others...better not do that or two brooms will spend a buttload of money to dye them all to make them worth $5 more. (by the way - certified angus DO bring more in the sale ring, but we have yet to see any significant difference in anything else - and they do not raise certified angus - but any black calves she ends up with, she sells separately so she can see how much more they bring - which is a farce, because any small lot of calves (1 or 2 calves) is usually combined with other small lots of calves and sold as a larger lot of 8 or 10, at least - so you STILL don't know what that one calf brought...but who am I and what do I know; I'm just the dumb donkey that sells our calves all together and they always bring more than her singles.)
***
Oh, and Marg, they are ear tagged! ROFLMAO

 

[DammitJanet]

Shame you sent that pink dye to KTmom...here was the perfect use for it! Maybe you can go find some more...lol.

 

[Shari]

When we showed steers, we used spray paint to fancy them up....why not pink? Or green? Or purple????

 

[Nomad]

I would need to draw a diagram to keep this straight. DF...awesome!
Would like to know why you are asking this question...where in the world did you get this crazy story?

Also...Witz's story is also very interesting/curious and and most importantly FUNNY!

 

[Shari]

Nomad, this crazy story is, unfortunately, not fiction, but a sampling of a day in my life with my in-laws (aka The Brooms). This is their logic.
***
While I will readily admit that I am an oddball, and I think a bit strange at times, some of the things these people do baffles me beyond all comprehension. This is one of those things.
***
I wish I'd made it up. Along with about everything else I've posted about them over the years...

 

[DammitJanet]

I think a purple cow would be adorable. Of course, I might be accused of having too much to drink.

 

[KTMom91]

I never saw a purple cow, I never hope to see one, but I can tell you here and now, I'd rather see than be one!

 

[Marguerite]

I hear a different version -

"I've never seen a purple cow, I never hope to see one. But if I see one anyhow, I'll take some shots of B1!"

Marg

 

[witzend]

Donna, you took the words right out of my mouth. Driver/Passenger!

 

[Marg's Man]

Okay So use terms similar to that used in cars; near (kerb) side and far (road) side such as tag side and off tag side. That way it doesn't matter if you drive on the left or right hand side of the road (erm cow).

Seriously - she sounds like she only has has one functioning neurone and that's not synapsing properly.

Marg's Man

 

[Shari]

Seriously - she sounds like she only has has one functioning neurone and that's not synapsing properly.

Marg's Man

And she'd probably hear you say that and say "why thank you!"

 

[Marg's Man]

Before she retired 30 years ago, my mother was midwifery nurse.

One day a patient (known to be a terrible hypochondriac) was in when she grabbed the doctor's arm and said this earnestly to him. She had been told to make sure that every doctor she saw was given this VITAL piece of information about her health.

 

[Shari]

OMG that's hysterical!

 

[Abbey]

This thread makes my head spin. WHO CARES if a cow is right or left handed? They're going to taz him anyways unless he's a pet cow that snuggles on your couch. He might be safe then.