animal lover
New Member
Hi,
I am a new comer to this forum seeking some answers to deal withthe situation of my 30 year old son.
This is my story. My son has not talked to my husband and I on and off since 2005. Even before that
we were never close. It all started when we left our home of 14 years and moved to a different state to
open a business.
Our son was very rebelious cause of the move, which we both understood cause he was only 14.
He finaly came around and made friends from school. Some good, some bad. He got into a lot of
trouble. He stole money and merchandise from our business.
One day I got a call from his girlfriends mother. Actually it was a message left on our voice mail.
In the message she said. "You better your parents whats going on or I will." I called his girlfriends
mother to find out what the problem was. She said yelling in a very high pitched voice. Your
son got my daughter pregnant. I confronted my son who was 17 at the time and asked hom why.
At first he denied the whole thing and I said if this is true youwon't have a problem taking a ride with me over to talk to her parents. he then confessed that he did. About a week after his girlfriends mother called and asked what we were going to do about the situation. See the difference between her and I. We had rules at our house. He was to be home between 9:30
and 10:00 on school nights and 10:30 on weekends. Our son was sneaking out of the house all hours of the night.
When I found out from a friend what was going on. I clled his girlfriends mother and told her our son has a curfew and in
our house if he does not abide by that he's grounded. her reply was. "oh their just kids and I said under no circumstance
is he aloud out in the middle of the night.
She obviously did not care enough about her daughter and realy had no set rules. Time went on and our son rebeled cause of our rules and told both my husband and I that he would do as he pleased. My husband told him if he wishes not to follow our rules that he could leave. I was angry, but beside myself. Angry with our son and hoe he treated us.
He moved in with his girlfriends parents. One day I got a call from the school principal staing that our son was not in school
for 30 days and that it was our responsiablility to make sure he goes to school.
#1. He was living with his girlfriends parents and we were not allowed any where near their house. I told this to the principal.
His reply was. it's still your responsiability so I called his girlfriends house and luckly my son answered the phone. I asked hime why he had not been to school in 30 days. His reply was "it's none of your business. I told him if he didn't go back to school
that I would call the cops. He didnt go back to the high school, but he did go bak to a finishing school and got his diploma and passed with all A's
After my grandaughter was born. I was invited by my sons girlfriend to come see the baby in the hospital. As time went on
I thought to myself. We are all only human and we do make mistakes so I tried my best to make things right with my son,
his girlfriend and her family. It was tough and I had to bite my tongue. My son his girlfriend and my grandbaby moved from
his girlfriens house and into an apartment. His girlfriend was presuring him to get married. He told her that he was not ready.
He was only 17, she was 18.
He had every intention to marry her. She just did not want to wait. He talke to my husband and I about it and we told him
that he had our support. Eventualy my son broke up with hsi girlfriend because of her being over domineering.
He finaly rented a house with a friend he worked with and seemed very happy. The problem was that he was not communicating with us at all until he met his second girlfriend. then he came arround. He was helping us with our business. He even watched it while we went away to a wedding. When we came back he told us he was getting married. We were so happy and she seemed like a nice girl.
When the wedding was approaching I got an e-mail from his fiance's stepmother asking for money for her stepdaughters bridal
shower. I ignored the e-mail that she resent 3 times and when we arrived 3 weeks before shower she asked me why? As it turned out we payed over 83% for everything. We finally approached both sets of parents and told them that they needed to help. Her stepfather handed my husband $600.00, her father and stepmother $300.00.
We also paid for their honeymoon, which they were not grateful for. After they cane back from their honeymoon they didn't even call us. We had to call them. Months went by without hearing from them. One day my son called and said he got a permotion and that they were moving out of state. We were very happy for him. A year went by after he moved out of state and even though I called and e-mailed him he never returned a reply. That following fall we went to visit him only to find out he got a divorce. He showe dus pictures of his wife cheating. I felt so bad for him. He had to go to a psychiatrist for help to deal with the divorce. Mind you he was only married 1 year. He was also dealing with problems with his ex- girlfriend who has turned their
child away from him.
Last October we went to visit our son. I took with me pictures for him of my grandaughter cause his ex refuses to send him any.
He realy got upset with me and said "keep them." I finally got out of him why he was os upset. the thing is he don't want a relationship with his father or I cause if he did he wouldn't ignore us and would answer his e-mails and messages.
I am ahving a terrible time accepting that our son will not talk to us. i can't talk to my husband about it cause he gets upset with me and says that's the way it is, but stil he talks about going to see him again. I am now on depresion medication and was
goign for help, but did not seem to work. He is our only child and it si so hard and nobody understands my feelins on this. I go to church every Sunday and pray for our son hoping he will be ok. Hopefully talking to you will help me with my situation.
I really love my son and only hope he will come bak to us.Thank you for listening.
Nanners
I am a new comer to this forum seeking some answers to deal withthe situation of my 30 year old son.
This is my story. My son has not talked to my husband and I on and off since 2005. Even before that
we were never close. It all started when we left our home of 14 years and moved to a different state to
open a business.
Our son was very rebelious cause of the move, which we both understood cause he was only 14.
He finaly came around and made friends from school. Some good, some bad. He got into a lot of
trouble. He stole money and merchandise from our business.
One day I got a call from his girlfriends mother. Actually it was a message left on our voice mail.
In the message she said. "You better your parents whats going on or I will." I called his girlfriends
mother to find out what the problem was. She said yelling in a very high pitched voice. Your
son got my daughter pregnant. I confronted my son who was 17 at the time and asked hom why.
At first he denied the whole thing and I said if this is true youwon't have a problem taking a ride with me over to talk to her parents. he then confessed that he did. About a week after his girlfriends mother called and asked what we were going to do about the situation. See the difference between her and I. We had rules at our house. He was to be home between 9:30
and 10:00 on school nights and 10:30 on weekends. Our son was sneaking out of the house all hours of the night.
When I found out from a friend what was going on. I clled his girlfriends mother and told her our son has a curfew and in
our house if he does not abide by that he's grounded. her reply was. "oh their just kids and I said under no circumstance
is he aloud out in the middle of the night.
She obviously did not care enough about her daughter and realy had no set rules. Time went on and our son rebeled cause of our rules and told both my husband and I that he would do as he pleased. My husband told him if he wishes not to follow our rules that he could leave. I was angry, but beside myself. Angry with our son and hoe he treated us.
He moved in with his girlfriends parents. One day I got a call from the school principal staing that our son was not in school
for 30 days and that it was our responsiablility to make sure he goes to school.
#1. He was living with his girlfriends parents and we were not allowed any where near their house. I told this to the principal.
His reply was. it's still your responsiability so I called his girlfriends house and luckly my son answered the phone. I asked hime why he had not been to school in 30 days. His reply was "it's none of your business. I told him if he didn't go back to school
that I would call the cops. He didnt go back to the high school, but he did go bak to a finishing school and got his diploma and passed with all A's
After my grandaughter was born. I was invited by my sons girlfriend to come see the baby in the hospital. As time went on
I thought to myself. We are all only human and we do make mistakes so I tried my best to make things right with my son,
his girlfriend and her family. It was tough and I had to bite my tongue. My son his girlfriend and my grandbaby moved from
his girlfriens house and into an apartment. His girlfriend was presuring him to get married. He told her that he was not ready.
He was only 17, she was 18.
He had every intention to marry her. She just did not want to wait. He talke to my husband and I about it and we told him
that he had our support. Eventualy my son broke up with hsi girlfriend because of her being over domineering.
He finaly rented a house with a friend he worked with and seemed very happy. The problem was that he was not communicating with us at all until he met his second girlfriend. then he came arround. He was helping us with our business. He even watched it while we went away to a wedding. When we came back he told us he was getting married. We were so happy and she seemed like a nice girl.
When the wedding was approaching I got an e-mail from his fiance's stepmother asking for money for her stepdaughters bridal
shower. I ignored the e-mail that she resent 3 times and when we arrived 3 weeks before shower she asked me why? As it turned out we payed over 83% for everything. We finally approached both sets of parents and told them that they needed to help. Her stepfather handed my husband $600.00, her father and stepmother $300.00.
We also paid for their honeymoon, which they were not grateful for. After they cane back from their honeymoon they didn't even call us. We had to call them. Months went by without hearing from them. One day my son called and said he got a permotion and that they were moving out of state. We were very happy for him. A year went by after he moved out of state and even though I called and e-mailed him he never returned a reply. That following fall we went to visit him only to find out he got a divorce. He showe dus pictures of his wife cheating. I felt so bad for him. He had to go to a psychiatrist for help to deal with the divorce. Mind you he was only married 1 year. He was also dealing with problems with his ex- girlfriend who has turned their
child away from him.
Last October we went to visit our son. I took with me pictures for him of my grandaughter cause his ex refuses to send him any.
He realy got upset with me and said "keep them." I finally got out of him why he was os upset. the thing is he don't want a relationship with his father or I cause if he did he wouldn't ignore us and would answer his e-mails and messages.
I am ahving a terrible time accepting that our son will not talk to us. i can't talk to my husband about it cause he gets upset with me and says that's the way it is, but stil he talks about going to see him again. I am now on depresion medication and was
goign for help, but did not seem to work. He is our only child and it si so hard and nobody understands my feelins on this. I go to church every Sunday and pray for our son hoping he will be ok. Hopefully talking to you will help me with my situation.
I really love my son and only hope he will come bak to us.Thank you for listening.
Nanners