This is the first post I've done after reading many many others for help when my daughter up and left one day so please sorry but I'm sure this will be long winded. My wife and I have 6 kids two step four adopted. Of the adopted ones 3 are a sibling group (same birth father) and the youngest was a private deal no genetic relation to the three. My oldest son graduated and began working for my neighbor. He has always been stand offish with us and know it all. Figured that's what kids do as teens considering my step daughter would just get angry at nothing and we couldn't calm her down ever. She is doing good as an adult now. Well my daughter was just quiet and told me she loves me I'd ask her if anything is on her mind and no all was great papa. Then hi school ended. She immediately ran off with an 18 year old freshman and immediately began hating on us thru texts and Facebook posts. I had no clue what happened! Where is my sweet young girl?!?! Took me two months to get over it and think back to her entire hi school career and subtle hints my wife had told me over the years. Finally I realized genetics won over environment. Learned about her birth moms violent history, remembered she tried manipulating every new school counselor, teachers, us with back pains that medically found nothing. My wife saw this coming, I did not because I let her handle the kids while I basically ignored both teens and hung out with the little ones whom were both babies when me got them, their older siblings were almost 5 and 6. Both those have moved on and I did get to talk to both of them individually. I truly believe my daughter is a sociopath who is using the people she is with until better ventures come along. My son, well he is and always had felt entitled, deserving of something have no idea. He's in our life but can be quite rude, but I have no concerns about his future. I don't know if I'll ever see my daughter again. I tried to raise them like we've had them since birth, but I admit attention from me, not my wife, focused on their little brother and sister. I see it now and deeply regret not being there 100 percent in their youth. Both have told me they never really attached to us, true or not who knows... but I know because of my past behaviors I am giving up for now trying to continue an adult relationship with them, mostly because it hurts me too much and I do blame myself for all this. I will admit I definitely would have never won father of the year with those two they were a handful, but I should have had more patients with them. For that alone I blame myself and have truly learned from my mistakes regarding the two younger ones. The one full sibling is 15 now and getting his college plans mentally in order. He is held in high esteem at his job for his work ethic (his older brother is as well, older sister seems to do well with hers I'm told), and his little sister is self teaching herself piano, like out of blue, just because she wants too. I'm terrified I'll do something wrong to screw them up like I feel I did with my older 2. Four very different personalities, one dad with a not so nice temper. Not anymore but my chest still pounds. That's it for now thanks for listening and I love deeply my kids, I just cannot relate to them and I can't take negative behavior in my life, spent too much of my life even before my wife living in my self hatred.