Today was our daughter's review court hearing. Things went well. She was so cheerful and upbeat. She had strait A's on her report card and was back on level three (after 3 tough weeks). She is making progress with working through her abuse history and learning the DBT skills that will save her life if they become ingrained. This is a tough judge, so we were worried because we have had to do some very heavy advocacy for her in this placement, we are not at all trusting or satisfied with the "unskilled workers", or bouncers as I call them, that spend so much time with our girl. We did not want her removed, just issues worked out. It could have gone either way-he could have said "Hey, you don't like it, we are removing her". To my surprize, he questioned the JJS worker about what the fascility was doing with the girls who were bullying my daughter. He wanted to be sure they were being held accountable. He told our daughter, "A_____, kids can be mean. I see the worst of the worst. You are in this place with some of them. I know you are not mean. If you can get through this with these girls and not let them hurt you, you can survive anywhere." The therapist had written in the report that, " A________ has the ability to get her parents upset about things so that they become over-protective. This will hinder her progress in therapy. We are continuing to work on this in family sessions (HELL she SAYS!) and it is likely they will need continued support with this. A_______ needs to work out problems on her own and advocate for her own needs without parental assistance." Judge completely ignored it-praised our parental involvement, told our daughter she had turned his bad day into a great day. He also told her he would pay her for every A she got at the end of this summer quarter! I am way happy about today, with one stubborn caveat, I can't get out of my mind... So... I have really struggled with when to intervene and when to give my difficult child responsibilty. I always say, "What are you going to do?" But in these institutions, it has almost always fallen on deaf ears. I have had to intervene for health and safety (absessed tooth, sinus infection, strep, shame and humiliation inflicted on her about eating, bullying which was unaddressed until we intervened etc.). I know that I should not continue to ruminate about this, several of you have told me I'm doing the right thing, but this is our last chance and I don't want to "interfere" with her progress. I am going to continue to document, take pictures,and even use a voice recorder, but what experiences have you had in these RTCs and state institutions? How did you address them?