Update on Youngest

Discussion in 'Substance Abuse' started by pasajes4, Jun 11, 2017.

  1. pasajes4

    pasajes4 Well-Known Member

    I have not posted on my son in sometime. He had been living in a cottage setting getting the best therapy he has ever had. He was earning money and privileges. He was the healthiest he has ever been. I could have a conversation with him that did not end in a circular ridicules string of blather. It did not happen over night. He had to dig deep, be honest, own his life, and stay away from drugs.

    Enter the girl and exit the program. He is living with this girl and her child. There are drugs and dealing drugs along with domestic violence (both of them). The calls for money, a place to stay ,and accusations of bad parenting blah blah on and on.

    I have a new phone number and a beefed up security system. I let him know that I love him and hope that his life is everything he wants it to be. That was it. It has been almost a month since I spoke with him. I don't facebook stalk or drive myself crazy calling hospitals and jails. On his 21 birthday I will stick a candle in a cupcake and celebrate the fact that I still love him and his gift is his freedom to live his life on his terms good or bad.
     
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  2. SomewhereOutThere

    SomewhereOutThere Well-Known Member

    Pas, you gave him every chance. He was doing so well. I thing the hardest thing for us is after they are finally doing so well....then throw the progress away for drugs or a girl/boy. Or both. Puzzling to anyone eho likes a sense of well being.

    You have really done all you could have done. And you are now taking good care of yourself. I think this is very courageous. It is harder in my opinion to finally let go for the sake of all than to hang on. I have done both.

    Keep being good to yourself. Your son is very young and can still turn it around if he wants to.
     
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  3. recoveringenabler

    recoveringenabler Well-Known Member Staff Member

    You are the definition of the "Warrior Parent" Pasa...your post is strong, resolved and ....bittersweet....you've done enough.....
    me too......I so understand how you feel.....

    ...God Bless you, your son and all our kids.....
     
  4. Lost in sadness

    Lost in sadness Active Member

    Wow! I admire your strength and courage. Yes, you have tried everything. So pleased you are living your life. xx
     
  5. wisernow

    wisernow wisernow

    Sad for the son but happy for you. You are reclaiming your life and finally making yourself a priority. Hugs to you!!!!!
     
  6. Kathy813

    Kathy813 Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Just keep reminding yourself that this was his choice and now he has to live with that choice. It is not up to you to fix the consequences of the choices he makes.

    You are handling this beautifully. Good job!

    ~Kathy
     
  7. Teriobe

    Teriobe Active Member

    Sorry your son doesnt see it