Star*
call 911........call 911
Hi all -
You know I thought this may be a little tongue in cheek cheery-type post after Timer ladies post and NVTS's posts about how we deal as parents with difficult children. But I thought I would share this story.
In it you can find disappointment, joy, frustration, tenacity, pointing out the lie, asking to prove the lie, tough-love and a willingness to fight for what is right. Much like a battle with a psychiatrist or school - for a difficult child.
So Valentines day is coming. And I have a sister that we suspect while genius, has the personality of a toad and no compassion for our Mom. Perhaps Aspie. Anyway every year/holiday that I can I send my Mom flowers. For a long time I put my sisters name on the card and Mom figured out she had nothing to do with it. So they started just coming from me. I realized that this in a way hurt Mom (that sis wasn't participating) so I started adding her name to the cards again (this past birthday of Moms) and send sister an email telling her she was on the card. She walked in and said "OH Star sent you flowers again?" Like (SLAP) duh - So Mom knew and called my bluff.
So for Valentines day I ordered from an on line flower company 1-800 something. The picture of red, white and pink roses were simply stunning. I made the card out and signed sisters name again - and quickly sent her an email telling her to NOT act surprised. Her reply - How much do I owe? I said nothing - Just take Mom out to dinner somewhere nice since I can't. She agreed.
Well the flowers came - and OMG what a disappointment. They were burgundy with black tips, red/pinkish, and yellow. My Mom dislikes yellow roses and I've NEVER ever gotten them for her. No one has. But she opened them, put them in a vase, called and thanked me and sent me a picture of the "beautiful" flowers. This is the disappointment part. They were NOT beautiful - I had gone to a lot of trouble to organize gift wrap in the same colors and sent packages out in time for V day. To get all at once in a color-coordinated effort (This is the joy part)
Well she would NEVER say a think about the flowers except that they were very pretty. Not ever a snarl or a "you know I don't care for these" just over joyed at the thought. I was ANGRY and my head blew off. (this is frustration)
So I called the flower place and couldn't get through. I kept calling and finally sent an email. (tenacity) and got an email reply from a 3rd world country saying I could have 20% off my next purchase. WELL DANDY - I never intend on ordering flowers again if you can't get THIS right - my first order. DUH. So I called and lines were busy, I kept calling, I kept calling, and I finally got a human. I told her that since my father passed - my mom used to get red roses from him wtih 2 white roses from us girls and when the grands came - a pink rose for each of them. And she started to say on the site it says the florist can substitute - (I had already checked) and I said show me where I'm on line now. She could not. (lie and caught in a lie) and I told her that offering me 20% wasn't going to get it - let me just cut to the quick and tell you the ONLY thing that will rectify this situation was 18 roses in red, pink and white sent out and delivered TODAY or TOMORROW. (see the tough love here? Huh? are you smiling)
I was put on hold, and the gal came back and said she would be putting an order in TODAY for red, white, and pink roses 18 to be delivered tomorrow to my Mom with an apology note from the florist and if they wanted me to have them call my Mom they would also. Not necessary.
So tomorrow 4 days after valentines - my Mom will get the correct color and stem length because I did not care that the growers were out of stock on red, white and pink - and what they sent were not premium roses, they were garden variety I could have gone to Lowes with cutters and done better.
I got off the phone and thought - OMG years ago I would have never even called let alone stayed with it - and not settled for what I wanted to make it right in my mind.
So hats off......
Hugs
Star
You know I thought this may be a little tongue in cheek cheery-type post after Timer ladies post and NVTS's posts about how we deal as parents with difficult children. But I thought I would share this story.
In it you can find disappointment, joy, frustration, tenacity, pointing out the lie, asking to prove the lie, tough-love and a willingness to fight for what is right. Much like a battle with a psychiatrist or school - for a difficult child.
So Valentines day is coming. And I have a sister that we suspect while genius, has the personality of a toad and no compassion for our Mom. Perhaps Aspie. Anyway every year/holiday that I can I send my Mom flowers. For a long time I put my sisters name on the card and Mom figured out she had nothing to do with it. So they started just coming from me. I realized that this in a way hurt Mom (that sis wasn't participating) so I started adding her name to the cards again (this past birthday of Moms) and send sister an email telling her she was on the card. She walked in and said "OH Star sent you flowers again?" Like (SLAP) duh - So Mom knew and called my bluff.
So for Valentines day I ordered from an on line flower company 1-800 something. The picture of red, white and pink roses were simply stunning. I made the card out and signed sisters name again - and quickly sent her an email telling her to NOT act surprised. Her reply - How much do I owe? I said nothing - Just take Mom out to dinner somewhere nice since I can't. She agreed.
Well the flowers came - and OMG what a disappointment. They were burgundy with black tips, red/pinkish, and yellow. My Mom dislikes yellow roses and I've NEVER ever gotten them for her. No one has. But she opened them, put them in a vase, called and thanked me and sent me a picture of the "beautiful" flowers. This is the disappointment part. They were NOT beautiful - I had gone to a lot of trouble to organize gift wrap in the same colors and sent packages out in time for V day. To get all at once in a color-coordinated effort (This is the joy part)
Well she would NEVER say a think about the flowers except that they were very pretty. Not ever a snarl or a "you know I don't care for these" just over joyed at the thought. I was ANGRY and my head blew off. (this is frustration)
So I called the flower place and couldn't get through. I kept calling and finally sent an email. (tenacity) and got an email reply from a 3rd world country saying I could have 20% off my next purchase. WELL DANDY - I never intend on ordering flowers again if you can't get THIS right - my first order. DUH. So I called and lines were busy, I kept calling, I kept calling, and I finally got a human. I told her that since my father passed - my mom used to get red roses from him wtih 2 white roses from us girls and when the grands came - a pink rose for each of them. And she started to say on the site it says the florist can substitute - (I had already checked) and I said show me where I'm on line now. She could not. (lie and caught in a lie) and I told her that offering me 20% wasn't going to get it - let me just cut to the quick and tell you the ONLY thing that will rectify this situation was 18 roses in red, pink and white sent out and delivered TODAY or TOMORROW. (see the tough love here? Huh? are you smiling)
I was put on hold, and the gal came back and said she would be putting an order in TODAY for red, white, and pink roses 18 to be delivered tomorrow to my Mom with an apology note from the florist and if they wanted me to have them call my Mom they would also. Not necessary.
So tomorrow 4 days after valentines - my Mom will get the correct color and stem length because I did not care that the growers were out of stock on red, white and pink - and what they sent were not premium roses, they were garden variety I could have gone to Lowes with cutters and done better.
I got off the phone and thought - OMG years ago I would have never even called let alone stayed with it - and not settled for what I wanted to make it right in my mind.
So hats off......
Hugs
Star