Going to St. Louis. Grandson wants me to visit.

Discussion in 'Parent Emeritus' started by SomewhereOutThere, Aug 6, 2017.

  1. SomewhereOutThere

    SomewhereOutThere Well-Known Member

    My sons ex now has her mother living with her. Grandson nevet liked her and is upset she is moving in. Coinciding with that, he has started calling me, asking me to please come down, telling me he remembers I was fun and loved him and he feels his "nana" (i hate that handle for a grandma) loves his brother but not him. That now she is just another person yelling at him. I know her. She isnt nice.i believe Grandson.

    This precious angel needs a loving grandma. Sadly, Bart does not want to introduce his son to his brothers and sisters because they are leery of him (his fault) so Grandson feels only Bart, my ex and me are on his side. So I am going. He needs me. I will make my visit all about him. Except for Bart, Grandson is always being shoved in the back. Well, not while I am there.

    I am looking forward also to meeting Barts girlfriend. She sounds very sweet. It has been six months now.
     
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  2. susiestar

    susiestar Roll With It

    I am sorry that Granson is so stressed! I hate that his Nana is so biased. Kids know these things. I am sure you will make him feel so loved. Poor little one. His mother is a nasty piece of work. Give him lots of huge for me!
     
  3. SomewhereOutThere

    SomewhereOutThere Well-Known Member

    Oh trust me. I will. Thanks, Susie. I feel so sorry for this little guy. Exes family of origin makes mine seem like The Brady Bunch!
     
  4. Snow White

    Snow White Temporarily in the Magic Kingdom

    SWOT, you are an "Angel Grandma"! So sad that a young boy is being rejected by a family member.

    I am glad that you can see through the looking glass that Grandson is needing your love and guidance - and awesome that you can travel there for him.
    It sounds like this can be turned into a really positive visit. Make sure to bring a HUGE supply of hugs and kisses!
     
  5. SomewhereOutThere

    SomewhereOutThere Well-Known Member

    Oh, McDonna, thank you so much. I always love big time on the grands. My grandson is the picked on one in his mothers family. She hates my son and he looks just like him. Her new husband is a redneck type, my son is more intellectual and grandsin is so bright. .his mother isnt and can not relate to his bookwormish ways. He has a half brother and that kid is still very small and is her current husbands child and doted on. Grandson is very bonded to my son.

    I dont really want to go because its a terrible trip...i get to St. Louis at 12am. But I do want to go too. My grandson is a sweet little boy and deserves some fuss.
     
  6. pigless in VA

    pigless in VA Well-Known Member

    Poor little guy. I hate that he's a sensitive soul living with yellers. It will be hard on you to leave him there, SWOT. Try to find a special way to stay in touch with him. He needs your love.
     
  7. SomewhereOutThere

    SomewhereOutThere Well-Known Member

    Thanks, piglet. We Skype. It was hard to leave last time. I am sure it will be hard this time. He is very timid and sensitive and a sitting duck for a family of bullies.
     
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  8. Littleboylost

    Littleboylost On the road unwanted to travel

    He is blessed to have tou SWOT. Love him all you can. How awful for him, to be in such a dynamic.
     
  9. SomewhereOutThere

    SomewhereOutThere Well-Known Member

    He never wants to go to his mothers. He said, "Daddys house is my house and I have to visit my mom." He cries before leaving my son. Its sad.

    Ex ran off with husband, whom she met on Match while still married to my son. She did not see grandson for a month after she ran off with this man. Its a long story...grandson is the big loser here.

    Son used to live in neighboring Illinois. Ex ran off after they moved to Missouri. It is much harder to get to Missouri than Chicago. I guess once we have our RV life we can visit whenever we like. Missouri has lots of good camping. And, honestly, its a beautiful state.
     
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  10. Lil

    Lil Well-Known Member

    It's nice that he's got you. I never really had a grandma. Only one living when I was born and she lived 2 hours away and wasn't really close to my dad - his stepmom. I bet the little guy adores you. What happened with the custody case? Has there been a final judgment? The can take so long. Why do you get in at midnight! That seems like a horrible flight.
     
  11. SomewhereOutThere

    SomewhereOutThere Well-Known Member

    Lil, thanks. First of all, I am afraid to fly so I go by train. Thats why its 12am.

    Secondly, son has residential custody but judge wants a parental coordinator assigned to them for exs counter motion for legal custody. I dont even want to think about it anymore. It never ends. Judge did not want to be the one to make a decision on that. Sons lawyer feels she will hang herself because she always talks about how horrible my son is and doesnt focus on the childs best interests at all. Im just wondering how long sons father will fund this. I am not even sure what a parental coordinator is. Just know its expensive!

    My grandmother was my savior. We were close all of her life. We spoke nearly every day. She was my mother to me...and also a friend. We had an amazing relationship.

    I cant get to St. Louis as much as I would if it were an easier route or if I would fly. I see my granddaughter from Chicago often. Its so heartbreaking...feel so badly for my grandson.
     
    Last edited: Aug 7, 2017
  12. Littleboylost

    Littleboylost On the road unwanted to travel

    Aww my heart goes it to you. Get to him and love him up. Big time.
     
  13. SomewhereOutThere

    SomewhereOutThere Well-Known Member

    I have every intention of doing that. He is too sweet for words and doesnt deserve this chaos.
     
  14. Albatross

    Albatross Well-Known Member

    Have a great time, SWOT!
     
  15. SomewhereOutThere

    SomewhereOutThere Well-Known Member

    Oh, Albatross...thanks. it is not imminent.At first Sept., but turned out not to be a good week. Now Oct. Its always tricky to make travel plans ehen grandson is only there 50% of the time. But I will get there sometime this year!!
     
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  16. Tanya M

    Tanya M Living with an attitude of gratitude Staff Member

    How wonderful that you will be able to go and spend time with him. You loving on him will be very good for him. Such a special bond you have with grandson. In the meantime, you can send him cards and fun little things in the mail to help him feel your presence until you can get there.
     
  17. SomewhereOutThere

    SomewhereOutThere Well-Known Member

    Good idea in the cards! I will start rivht away!