Whoa - here goes (and husband and i are definitely "battle weary"). 32yo son was living 1500 miles away with girlfriend. Last Friday night I receive frantic call from son. girlfriend has placed a restraining order on him. He took the bus to our hometown the next day. This is the third restraining order placed against him by three different girlfriend's in the last ten years! He is not physical, but he harasses a LOT. On the bus trip down, he texts me constantly, telling me he is not coming down. He is not making a lot of sense. girlfriend and he have a dog and he is talking about kidnapping the dog, etc. Anyway, the entire time he was on the bus and arrived here Sunday night. Stays with a friend until friend kicks him out. girlfriend (a social worker, no kidding) is staying in contact with him. She and I have communicated some. She was telling him they have a chance if he gets a job and into therapy and stops lying. She informs husband and me that son has not worked in a year! We had no idea. Her family had paid their rent the last three months. She is moving back to her hometown in late February. She is a sweetheart and is finally realizing her enabling - as husband and I are realizing ours. Saturday, he contacts us and wants to meet at a fast food restaurant. husband and I show up. Son walks in and says he wants to get a gift card for the friend who picked him up at the airport. This gift card would be to a bar. husband and I say no. Son walks out, gets in vehicle with this friend and they drive away. Unbelievable. In the meantime, I find this site and have read just about everything. Made me feel so strong. An hour ago, i receive a text from son, "Want to get a haircut." I have not replied. Last we heard, he is staying with the father of another friend...who is a retired social worker. (I find it interesting about the social workers in his life). We have fifteen year history of son lying and manipulating. He has done just about everything I read in other threads. I shake my head at the similarities. I am thinking, ignore the text until he gives an apology for Saturday's bizarre encounter? Ignore it forever? Reply tomorrow with something like, "We love you and will be here AFTER you get your life back on track". Your input is appreciated. I hate what this does to what little inner peace I have these days. husband and I retired and not made of money. Thanks.