Older women and problems with theft...

Discussion in 'The Watercooler' started by Marcie Mac, Apr 16, 2008.

  1. Marcie Mac

    Marcie Mac Just Plain Ole Tired


    You've heard about people who have been abducted and had their kidneys removed by black-market organ thieves.

    My thighs were stolen from me during the night a few years ago. I went to sleep and woke up with someone else's thighs. It was just that quick. The replacements had the texture of cooked oatmeal. Whose thighs were these and what happened to mine? I spent the entire summer looking for my thighs. Finally, hurt and angry, I resigned myself to living out my life in
    jeans. And then the thieves struck again.

    My tush was next. I knew it was the same gang, because they took pains to match my new rear-end to the thighs they had stuck me with earlier. But my new butt was attached at least three inches lower than my original! I realized I'd have to give up my jeans in favor of long skirts.

    Two years ago I realized my arms had been switched. One morning I was fixing my hair and was horrified to see the flesh of my upper arm swing to and fro with the motion of the hairbrush. This was really getting scary-my body was being replaced one section at a time. What could they do to me next?

    When my poor neck suddenly disappeared and was replaced with a turkey neck, I decided to tell my story. Women of the world, wake up and smell the coffee! Those 'plastic' surgeons are using REAL replacement body parts stolen from you and me! The next time someone you know has something 'lifted', look again - was it lifted from you?

    THIS IS NOT A HOAX. This is happening to women everywhere every night. WARN YOUR FRIENDS!


    P.S. Last year I thought some one had stolen my Ta Ta's. I was lying in bed and they were gone! But when I jumped out of bed, I was relieved to see that they had just been hiding in my armpits as I slept. Now I keep them hidden in my waistband
  2. Hound dog

    Hound dog Nana's are Beautiful

  3. judi

    judi Active Member

    Too funny!
  4. Sara PA

    Sara PA New Member

    This is not a hoax. Every word is true.
  5. witzend

    witzend Well-Known Member

    Hey, I checked it out on Snopes, and she ain't lying!
  6. klmno

    klmno Active Member

    :rofl: :yes:

    I knew it- someone had to be behind all this (no pun intended)

  7. gcvmom

    gcvmom Here we go again!

    Happened to me, just last week!
  8. KTMom91

    KTMom91 Well-Known Member

    As I creep closer towards 50, I find this to be more and more true...sigh.
  9. Big Bad Kitty

    Big Bad Kitty lolcat

    So mom wasn't lying to me after all...boy, do I owe her an apology.
  10. Abbey

    Abbey Spork Queen

    Ok, Marcie...you get my first rolling laugh of the day. :crazy1: That was so well said. I think that gang migrates to Vegas every now and then.

  11. Abbey

    Abbey Spork Queen

    I sent this to my mom and she nearly died laughing. She called me just literally cracking up.

    This is a saver.